#ALimerickADay

A paranoid couple, one June
Was deciding where they'd honeymoon.
"Iceland?" asked the wife
He said: "Not on my life!
We'd both slip and fall, you buffoon!"

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A failed artist - an alcoholic has-been
Tried to sober up, and has since,
Swapped his pastels for diesel,
Wrestled with his own easel,
And drunk paint in the absence of absinthes!

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A gentleman, visiting from Canada,
Filled his wallet with rupees from Canara
Demonetisation struck,
And the foreigner was stuck
Wondering if he was on Candid Camera.

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There was a beauty at his door, so Xavier
Put on his most flirtatious behaviour.
She said, "Hello, I am Gwyneth!
Do you have a minute
To talk about Jesus, our saviour?"

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A go-go girl from Newcastle
Hit a man in the face with her tassel.
He said, "Thanks for the blow!
My eyes 'bout hit the floor
Now they're back in my skull, with no hassle!"

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तुम तो ख़फ़ा थे, वो भी बेवजाह थे
तुम तो ख़फ़ा थे, वो भी बेवजाह थे
तुमने ना समझा हम, क्योँ परेशां थे

केह भी ना पाये, रेह भी न पाये,
कैसी ये उलझन, किसको बताए

माना की हुई गलती, थोड़ी सी हाँ हमसे
अब माफ़......भी कर दे हमें..........

सूखे है लब मेरे, नम हो जाते
सूखे है लब मेरे, नम हो जाते
मैं और तुम गर हम हो जाते

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Two lovebirds in tuition did meet,
They hadn't yet got wisdom teeth!
For her, he ditched his games
And she scrawled his name
In the margins of every Navneet.

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Once, little Bill took a carver
And clean shaved his poor, sleeping father.
When Daddy awoke,
He about had a stroke,
Saying, "For what am I paying a barber?!"

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A farmer by name of Chauhan
Had the habit of chewing on paan
It looked as if he murdered
All the animals he herded
From the red stains all over his barn!

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Said a diner to his waiter, post-haste,
"My soup's much too salty in taste!"
Said the waiter, "You were rude,
So, in turn, I acted shrewd,
And poured in my own water waste."

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