It's been a while
since I last wrote to you
maybe because I wanted you to feel
how silence could speak volumes
and stab more than words could ever do
But I realise
you were far more cold-blooded, Darling
because I couldn't continue it
even half as long as you.
-
// Little Things //
I guess I have always been one of those people who observed things very closely.
So when it came to you needless to say, I loved to note every little detail like how your eyes crinkled when you smile or what your laugh sounded like. How you kept on tilting your head until those stray strands of your hair fell in your face just so you can tuck it back again and how you have a habit of flailing your hands around while explaining the things you love. The way you write in tiny and fill every little corner of the page or the way you always arrange your books in a specific sequence. The tiny little mole which sits on the side of your nose and a similar one at the back of your shoulder. How much you hated wearing your spectacles which hid your eyes that shined a beautiful warm brown in sunlight and widened whenever it caught me staring.
So when I think about you, I always remember you in these tiny little pieces which made you a whole.
-
03.12.20
Because some part of me
might forever remain in love with the
constellations in you.-
// इश्क़ सतरंगी //
जानती हो? रोज़ बस से आते वक़्त मेरे घर के बगल में
मुझे तुम्हारे नाम की एक दुकान दिखाई पड़ती है ।
लेकिन व्यंग तो देखो, वहां मीठी चाशनी में डुबाएं रंग बिरंगे बर्फ़ के गोले बिकते है ।
ना जाने क्यूं जब भी उदास रहती, अक्सर खुद को उस दुकान के आगे खड़ा पाती हूं
जहां अक्सर कुछ बच्चे फटे कपड़ो में रोड किनारे बैठे रहते है,
उनके संग बैठ, थोड़ी सी ही सही मिठास बांट
उनके आंखों में वह चमक और मुस्कान देख,
घर एक खाली जेब, रंगे जीभ और दिल में अजीब सी खुशी के साथ आती हूं।
और जब भी वो बच्चे मुझसे मेरा नाम पूछते,
ना जाने क्यूं मै उसी दुकान का नाम लेती हूं।-
If I ever put our story into words
I don't know
whether they'll hate you
or hate me more,
for destroying something
as beautiful as us.-
That one maths teacher who hates you for no reason, and scolds you for barest minimum of stuffs.
-
Maybe you're not in love with me.
Maybe you're just haunted by the memories of
me loving you.
-
Going through our school album,
often I stumble upon your pictures
my finger hovers above for a little while
and before I even know it,
I am staring at both of us
smiling and laughing at the camera
without a care in the world
and for that little moment
I almost feel the same warmth I felt back then.-