Never a goodbye.

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I remember falling in love with you.
Night sky and on your thoughts I was high.
You fulfilled the empty spaces,
However your words were like unsolved cases.
Listening to you whining, I fell for you but I was constantly declining.

I remember falling in love with you
Like a child learning their first steps,
Or how we find balance sheets complex.
My heart racing faster,
I knew this beautiful feeling can be a disaster.

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I ran, I kept running from every question that came my way,
Chaos, Mess, Mistakes, Assumptions-
I kept running. I kept running.
All I needed was to open up they say.
Drenched in my own thoughts,
Right or wrong ~ pain or cure doesn't matter now,
My pen bleeds what I envisage.
I see it's nothing, just empty.
Empty as if Im full of nothingness,
Crying as if I've lost all emotions,
Shouting as if I don't know how to whisper,
Dying as if I've died before.

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It's been a while since I slept; Peacefully
It's been a while since I smiled; Really
It's been a while since I laughed; Actually
It's been a while since I felt; Lovely
It's been a while since I changed; Unknowingly
It's been a while since I died; Silently

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I sit down all blank,
Smiling stupidly,
Thinking 'Let's see how worst could life do to me'.
Overthinking,
Emotions,
Crying,
Almost dead,
Just waiting for death to make me their.

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