She’s everywhere and nowhere. And that’s the thing that hurts the most — that she’s gone, but she’s still here, threaded through every part of me. I keep trying to outrun the memories, but they’re always there. Like shadows at dusk, following me even when I’m trying to forget.

Maybe one day I’ll stop seeing her in the clouds, in the music, in the spaces she used to fill. But right now, she’s the ghost in every quiet moment, the echo of every promise I never made.

And that’s the part of losing her that I don’t know how to live with.

-

I’d find her in the strangest places. In the songs I used to play when she’d sit beside me and hum along, out of tune but perfect because it was her. In the coffee shops she loved, where the barista still asks me, “Just you today?” And I always nod like it doesn’t matter. But it does. God, it does.

She’d always tease me about overthinking everything. “You make a tragedy out of a traffic jam,” she’d laugh. And she was right. But now the traffic is just another reminder that she’s not here to laugh at me for it. The world feels like it’s stopped making sense without her to balance me out.

— % &I didn’t tell her how much she meant to me. Not really. I thought she already knew — that she could read it in the way I looked at her when she wasn’t watching. But I think she needed me to say it out loud. And I didn’t. So I keep carrying those words like a secret I’ll never tell.

I see her in the glow of streetlights on empty roads, in the half-smile of strangers who don’t know how much they look like her for a second, in the soft ache of songs I used to sing just to make her laugh.

— % &

-

I never thought the weight of someone’s absence could feel so heavy. Some nights, it’s like I can’t breathe without hearing her laughter echoing in the spaces she used to fill.

She left on a Tuesday, and I swear the whole city felt different after that. Like even the clouds knew she wasn’t here anymore. I’d look up at them — those drifting, careless clouds — and wonder if she was seeing the same sky wherever she was. Or if she’d stopped looking for me in the clouds altogether.

There were days I’d catch myself dialing her number just to hear her voice, and then I’d remember she wasn’t mine to call anymore. I’d stop halfway and stare at my phone, fingers trembling like I’d forgotten how to let go.

She had this way of making everything feel easy, even the hard parts. And now that she was gone, everything felt like a struggle — like I was moving through the world half-blind, always searching for something I couldn’t name.

-

When I’m gone,
the space I leave
behind will feel
too big to fill

-

I know who will help me when I’m drowning, who will let me sink, and who will throw me off the bridge to watch me drown .

-

पंख चाहे जितने भी बड़े हों,
पिंजरे में उड़ान नहीं होती।

-

🥺🥺🥺

-

When humans reach
the zenith of development
humans themselves
will be of no use.

Machines will think
create and evolve
challenging our worth

We will be left
questioning
our worth

-

We cleared the forests
replaced it with IT Park

Now AI is here
replacing us.

First
the trees
now it's you and me

Guess progress means
making everything dust.

-

किसी लड़की की आँखों में झाँको,
अगर वहाँ कोई सपना नहीं है,
तो समझ लो—ये समाज उसे मार चुका है।

— निर्मल वर्मा, एक दिन लौटेंगे

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