Comfort swept in like a river,
knowing she didn’t have to bow down to the pressure
of staying strong all the time.
Comfort swept in like a river,
knowing she didn’t have to put on an eternal smile.
Maybe it is okay to break down a little,
even when the society tells you to be strong perennially.
Maybe it is okay to feel gloomy,
before rising to conquer the world.

-

‘Everything’s just so perfect’, she counted her blessings.
‘What’s wrong with me?’ she asked,
hoping the unsettling feeling would go away.
As she rested on the couch with no answers,
she comforted herself, ‘maybe its okay’.
‘Maybe its okay to feel weak,
maybe its okay to feel unsettled,
maybe its okay to weep and wail,
maybe its okay to stare into nothingness,
and feel nothing.’

-

‘Maybe some coffee would help,’ she opened the box of coffee powder.
With the cup of coffee held warmly between her hands,
she walked to the verandah,
hoping the unsettling feeling would go away.
Trying to rewind her memories,
she found her life go exactly as she wanted.
A good family, an amazing job, a perfect gym routine,
friends who partied with her, colleagues who enjoyed her company,
neighbours who shared their meals with her.

-

Her hands searched for her phone.
The alarm sound irked her every morning.
Off it went, as she swiped it up.
Her eyes searched for some light,
as the sun glazed through the curtain.
‘A bright new morning’, she thought to herself.
She stood on her feet to draw open the laced curtains,
but a gloom filled her heart.
‘What’s wrong with me?’ she asked.
With no answer, she dragged herself to the kitchen.

-

Can you see the tricolour high and mighty?
Can you see it's colours vibrant and alive?
Can you feel the air around with a fervour of freedom?
Can you see the many hands that hold it?
Oh, but you ask the hands their religion?
You ask them the gods they believe in?
You ask them the language they speak?
You ask them the caste they inherited?
You ask them their gender?
You lynch them, maim them and dismember them,
not caring this is what our freedom fighters fought against.
Maybe look around and see for yourself,
India lived for 73 years,
because of you and me,
with our backgrounds and religions,
with our beliefs and economic status,
with our identities and ideologies.
But do you care?

-

Some days, the burden
gets heavier.
Some days, the tears
get bigger.
Some days, the pain
gets murkier.

-

To the person who will never read this,
my heart skips a beat
on reading your name.
My brain goes twinkly
on hearing your voice.
My smile gets wobbly
on thinking about you.
But you know nothing,
and I am content.
You will never know anything,
and I hope it stays that way.
Even as you fall head over heels
over another girl,
even as you tell me about her,
I will smile,
knowing you'll never be mine.
As you stay my friend,
standing by my side,
you will always be my one true love.

-

Some days, just waking up
might feel like a burden.
Other days, trying to relax
might feel like a pain.
Will somebody pay attention?
Will somebody listen?
Even the light feels
like a dark tunnel.
Will somebody pay heed?
Or will nobody look my side.

-

What if 2020 didn't turn out to be
the way we expected?
Did 2019 turn out to be
the way we desired?
Did the years before turn out to be
the way we planned?
Haven't all years thrown in
surprises for us?
Some bad, some good?
Some disgusting, some worth remembering?
Haven't we survived
the joy, the trauma,
the blessing, the pain,
the bliss, and the scars?
Haven't we jumped back
from the defeats and the drubbing?
Haven't we taken time to
reflect and pause?
Haven't we set out
on a conquest to conquer the world?
We have survived,
because we still breathe and live on.
If we could do this,
will 2020 be different?

-

Off they went to the land of nothing,
the land that grabbed their souls and hearts.
Off they left from the land of opportunities,
the land that filled their stomachs.
The privileged sat inside the comforts of their homes,
while the nameless wandered around.
All they asked for
was some food and dignity.
Meandering, their feet betrayed them,
their stomachs fooled them,
their hearts led them astray,
the powerful cheated them,
as railway tracks befriended them.
Off they went to the land of nothing,
the land that grabbed their souls and hearts.

-