Have you had that moment yet? You know, the one moment where you get the the worst news you could’ve imagined in that moment. That news that paralyzes you. Takes your life and completely flips everything upside down.
And even tho you want to stay in the denial stage you have no time to do that. This problem is happening no matter what & it is happening fast.
And as terrified as you are.. you often find yourself getting lost in thought.
Lost In thought of things that you know, has no possibility of happening. Now, even though you’ve accepted that.. You still can’t help but get lost in that fairytale daydream. Where instead of feeling alone and scared by the delivery of this news. it gives you butterflies, gives you someone to share the happy news with, Excites you with thoughts of the future.
Now don’t get me wrong. I know what I got myself into. I know the roll I have been playing. I also understand how messed up and how wrong it is of me. There are days where I feel like the lowest of the low. I also have the days where I can’t help but to let my walls down and just enjoy the moment.
So to say I don’t think about the “what if” factor would be a complete and blatant lie.
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