The day
sitting in this empty cold room ...
Everything in front of me was vague due to filling tear drops..... slowing rolling down.
This Time without sobbing or screaming I was dead inside.

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Feeling of nothingness,
It is like desiccation. Just immobile, without control of your own consciousness, Struggling to be alive.

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I didn't realize when
The innocence within me died...
The emotion of being alive became a burden...
Those little eyes of joy, excitement and new begining were lost in this environment but the fear grew stronger and the spark was gone.

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You meet a new lifestyle...
Eventually forgetting the previous one... This is when your priorities changes your promises break..
But you are not the one affected..
Happy for you who is a dream which break's when I wake up.
Is this me overthinking ?
No I've just hopped into reality

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A cell.
when cancerous cell invade our body for a matter of time it continues to live and get nourished until it has done alot of damage it tends to go undetected...just like this there are people who masks under the tag of victims.

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Nobody saw--> that scared little girl wounded by words , traumatized by the view, roaming here and there for love that she didn't knew.
everybody saw --> a girl with bunch of insecurities and trust issues, the one who was a control freak with pridefullness.

Indeed not everyone can be saved.

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Few of us are in that stagnant stage of life....
everyday feels the same we wait until it ends...
Just living with those shitty values that are forced on us by our society and family...
now the question is not why? till when?
but it's just called existing in this filthy little world.

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"NOW "
I've been in this state of loneliness....
now my fear is coming true...
i found myself stuck here,
struggling to get out i thought being by myself will go easy on me but as it's been a long time .. this became my new comfort
now it's difficult for me to stay with someone... my own people.
i don't like to be this way suffering but now i choose the pain.

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those wild trees once asked me ....
why do you cry every night and hide your pain in the morning?
you have so many people but with none of them you share your pain?
why you sit beside me in silence and smile even in pain?

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They say it's just a phase it will pass...
it is not passing as possibly it hits me every night,
telling me how empty my house is, how lonely my thought is and how it makes living each day questionable,
and they call it phase, it seems like it is my life afterall.

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