The Cold & Quiet December

Finally together, you and me
After 11 long months
I can sit with you, find some peace

Look back at the triumphs of Jan
Cherish the joys of Feb
Endless March and its stress
In April, I was in a foolish place

May kept a low profile but
June landed me in a few ugly fights
July had rain, mud, cloudy nights
August soared me to a hopeful sky

September gave me new things to try
October somewhere had my hands tied
November said it’s been a while you cried
Now with you I relive all that I pine

Let’s make a 30 day plan
Raise a toast to laughs and pain
My dear cold and quiet December
Stay while I cry in the rain

Finally together, you and me
After 11 long months, help me
Go through another year of laugh and pain

-

Dard

Saawan me barasti bundein
Aaj tujhpe fir barsi hai
Mitti ki khushboo ki tarah
Aaj tu fir kabr se utha hai

Ghataon ko cheedti dhoop jaise
Aaj fir tu nikla hai
Nam pattein jaise mere aarzoo
Tere taap se thoda murjhaya hai

Aaj tu fir mehman mera
Ye khali dil mezbaan tera
Tere qaid me aahat kal mera
Mera kal hi zimmedar tera

Bas itna sa hi qissa hamara
Mere do pal ki muskaan
Ek naye khwaab ki galti
Aur dekhu tera aag sa jalna

Ab ye fariyaad bhi hai rozana
Jaate hue bheed ke beech
Dhundu bas ek hi saaya par
Kadmo ke dhool me tujhe hi paaya

Is raat ki hai aakhri peher
Lafzon se aankhen bhaari hai
Jin muraado se jee raha tha
Aaj se tere zidd ke qaidi hai

-

Adhoora

Ek adhoora sa haal hai
Har lamhe lagta ek saal hai
Jo jee tarse teri ek jhalak ka
Roke na ruke ye nazre
Tu lagti bemisaal hai

Tu shayad mujhse niraash hai
Jis tarah niraash mera saaya mujhse
Tujhse judi meri ek muskaan hai
Kuch faaslon ke darmiyaan
Najane ye kaisa mera haal hai

Chahat se ab ek doori hai
Chahat jo tere dil ki hai
Teri chahat ko jo tarse dil
To lage ye chahat ye doori
Mera hona bhi gair zimmedar hai

Ek adhoora sa haal hai
Ye doori lage gehra laal hai
Jo tu guzre nazro ke darmiyaan
Teri zulfo me mera kuch pal
Aur kuch uljhe sawaal hai

Jo tujhse kuch keh du to
Sochu tu soche kaise
Kya tu niraash mujhse
Ya tu nazre pherkar hai naaraz
Teri khamoshi me mere saare malaal hai

-

Yaari

Zindagi Tere lamho se, kabhi yaari na ho payi.
Ek arsa koshish ki, kuch lamhe ji na payi.
Tu lage kabhi bairi so, kabhi lage saanso si.
Dard say kuch chupa hai, dhaage se jude is mann ki.

O bairi O bairi, mujhme aisi Kya payi?
Sukhe palko ko ab aansu v na bhiga payi.
Aye meri Zindagi, ye teri hai khushnaseebi,
Ye dard Tere sang bategi, ruh me Jo tune basaayi.

Ab q na mujhe tod de tu, ya aanchal me basaale.
Meri saari khushiyo ko, kisi aur ka pata de.
Ab to khuda v lapata hai, ji bhar k ilzaam de.
Agar ji raha hu to, jine ki v saza de.

Ye muraade hai paagal si, bachpan k khwabo si.
Teri ik barsaat se, mit jayegi nishaan iski.
Tu lage kabhi toofan si, kabhi lage khushboo si,
In aankhon me hai chupi, tujhpe ek naraazgi.

-

Pretender 1

I remember the memories you gave
Things to cherish and the debts to pay
Questions remain unanswered till day
You pretended you had nothing to say

I have no scars to show
The blade slashed not the skin
But scratched mercilessly the bones

I remember the real you
The more I do, the more I want to forget you
You live somewhere deep inside me
The real you clashing with the fake me

All I wanted was to be me
No curtains, no charades
To those who saw me

You were the only one
Just like the planets with one sun
I cried, I smiled, I fought for you
But you said, I pretended with you too?

Everyday is like yesterday
Let myself loose and tie me up in chains
All I do is pretend to be sane

-

Gaanv

Mai aksar nakshe me nahi ata
Kabhi kabhi nazar me bhi nahi ata
Mai hu har jagah, hazaron lakhon mein par
Kabhi kabhi main ginti mein bhi nahi ata

Mera aashiyaan choti si hai
Chote mere logon ke khwaab
Ek chatt, char kapde, do waqt ki roti, bas
Itna mil jaye to zindagi hai gulzar

Sheher to din raat jagmag hai
Humne taaron ke niche raat kaate
Sheher me bas yantron se ghire putle
Khuli taazi hawa se milte hai hum savere

Aksar mujhe tak koi rasta nahi ata
Na aati hamesha rail gaadiyan
Hawaai jahaaj to khwaab me bhi na aate
Aaj bhi aati nahi pure din bijli yahaan

School, aspataal, kuch hai kuch nahi
Par hai nahi kaamiyaabi ki seediyan
Baap ka khet hai bete ka taqdeer
Betiyon ko aaj bhi samjhe pareshaniyan

Mushkilein hai, hai nazook soch ki naadaaniyan
Jaane wale aksar laut ke aate nahi yahaan
Koi is pinjde se azaad, koi iska qaidi
Peedi dar peedi, main hi reh jata hoon yahaan

Khair ye sab to apne hai
Inke khwabon ki neend meri aanchal me hai
Koi chor jaye mujhe, shayad mai unme nahi
Sab kuch samet ke bas mai hi hoon yahaan

-

Shikayatein

Kuch Shikayatein Khud Se Hi Ki Hai
Iraado Ke Makaan Se Door Murado Ke Baag Me Jaa Nahi Pate
Woh Suhane Lamhe Hamesha Chup Chap
Aur Hum Ab Kuch Bayaan Nahi Kar Pate

Kuch Shikayatein Khud Se Hi Ki Hai
Armaanon Ki Qaid Mein Khwabon Ko Jee Nahi Pate
Paane Ki Koshish Mein Jo Kho Gaye
Khwaab Woh Hum Keh Nahi Pate

Kuch Shikayatein Khud Se Hi Ki Hai
Soch Mein Hamesha Doobe Hum Ab Has Bhi Nahi Pate
Yeh Dimaag Bas Ek Daud Ka Ghoda
Ise Shant Kar Do Pal Thandi Saans Le Nahi Pate

Kuch Shikayatein Khud Se Hi Ki Hai
Hum Apno Ko Waqt Bhi Nahi De Pate
Apne Aap Se Har Waqt Guftagu
Par Unke Lafz Sun Bhi Nahi Pate

Kuch Shikayatein Khud Se Hi Ki Hai
Apno Ke Sath Kuch Pal Jee Nahi Pate
Kaatne Ke Nahi Jeene Ke Armaan Liye
Hum Apno Se Bhi Door Hi Reh Jate

Kuch Shikayatein Khud Se Hi Ki Hai
Us Din Ki Mansha Liye Is Din Ko Bhul Jate
Tanhai Se Rishta Bas Aisa Hai Ki
Usse Hi Apni SariShikayatein Karte Reh Jate

-

The Message

The Number You’ve Dialled Does Not Exist
Please Check The Number And Try Again
The Number You’ve Dialled Does Not Exist
Please Check The Number And Try Again

I Have Been Listening To This Message
Through A Span of 3000 Days
I Cut The Call Sinking In Chilly Silence
The Yearning Has Ruthlessly Turned Me Gray

Hey Dad, I Got A New Job
This Is The Role, That’s The Pay
New Place To Grow, New Path To Pave
Tell Me, What Do You Have To Say?

Hey Dad, I Saved Some Dough
I Got Meself A Brand New Ride
Bless My Journey And When You Can
Do Join Me For A late Night Ride

Hey Dad, The Job Is Killing Me
Someone Always Has Something To Say
The World Is a Goddamn Ugly Place
How Did You Go Through In Your Day?

Hey Dad, I Sent You A Pic
The Girl Just Took My Heart Away
Tell Me What You Think
PS I Miss You And Your Food Everyday

I Have So Much To Talk About
My Everyday And How I Turn To Gray
All The Smiles And The Tears I Shed But
Every Time I Call, A Voice Mercilessly Rants

The Number You’ve Dialled Does Not Exist
Please Check The Number And Try Again
The Number You’ve Dialled Does Not Exist
Please Check The Number And Try Again

-

Liar

You won’t find words behind my eyes
You see me smile and hide my lies
You still ask all that’s in my head and
You still question everything I’ve said
I am a sweet liar and that’s what you just craved
But now my lies are choking you instead

You keep saying
Be real or nothing
But it blinds you to see
The black in my mind

Now I am just a lie as much as you are
But I live with them and you can never run too far
Now you ask how I do it everyday
Coz my mind has grayed beyond my age
I am a pretty liar for you to disgrace
My truth will just laugh at both your faces

I won't fall in
Love with your follies
So why don’t you find a new
Patsy for your jibes

I don’t want to give you the truth
So you can just destroy my heart
I will lie on to save and go on
With my soul and find my paradise

-

The Ghost

There Is A Ghost Around Me Forever
At Times It Hurts But More Often It Looks After
As I Wade Through The Waters Of Deceit
The Ghost Repeats, It'll Be Harder Hereafter

For Long You Were Always Around
To My Reckless Flights You Were The Ground
And Then Came A Dark Rainy Afternoon
Then You Were Nowhere To Be Found

There Were Noises Of People But Not A Sound
Shoulder Pats Poured Like A Lump Sum Amount
I Remember The Words Uttered In The Wake
Should've Known They Were Worthless To Count

A Metal Was Ushered To My Palms
Said It Would Keep The Spirits Away And Calm
Swiftly It Slipped My Half Hearted Grip
You Were There, Ghosts Would Do Me No Harm

I Have Seen You Too Much To Remember
In Times Dire, I Know You're Around The Corner
The Ghost In My Sleep, One That Only Matters
Even Through Veils, You Keep Pushing Me Further

There's A Ghost Always Watching Over
Let's Me Fall, But Says Rise Up Stronger
Alive In Death Still Not Giving Up
At Sunset, The Ghost Says There's Another

-