one day, you'll find the one, and it will all be worth it
~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~

i know it's devastating, getting your heart broken
while searching for the one, that magical love.
it's not your fault; love has become rare.
but one fine day
he will come along, trying to learn you.
he'll know your favourite books,
& what makes you happy.
he'll learn your favourite song
and observe how your fingers move with the rhythm.
he will watch you jumping in and out of habits,
trying new hobbies, getting bored.
and yet he'll never get enough of you.

darling, you'll be magic in someone's life
and oh! the way he will look at you,
you will know he's fascinated.
he will slowly tuck your hair behind your ear gazing at you
& in that moment you'll feel alive, you will love being alive.

he will hold you so close as if you're too precious to let go.
he will look at you just like you look at the moon.
he will kiss you like there is no place he would rather be.
he will love you so much
that it'll make you wonder if you deserve it.
& in that moment you'll feel alive, you will love being alive.

-

maybe you're not supposed to fix it..!
~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~

darling, it's breaking you
& you know it,
but the damage is so deep
that you're scared to look at it.
so you keep fixing things around you
but maybe, you need to run away;
maybe you're not supposed to fix it.

you deserve better
& you know it,
but you're so afraid of hope
that you'll never admit it.
so you keep making things better around you
but maybe, you need to let go;
maybe you're not supposed to fix it.

look around, the world is yours
& you have no idea what it has kept aside just for you.
darling, the life you have romanticised,
it's all yours to cease.
nothing is holding you back but you
& you know it.
so maybe, it's time,
it's time for you to let good things reach you
'cause you're most definitely not supposed to fix it.
— % &— % &

-

whatever love is made of, you and i have the same..!
~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~

such an universal thing yet so different for everyone
but for you and me, it's the same;
cold like moon yet radiating the warmth of the sun.

can we ever explain it without sounding lame?
it defies understanding!
but whatever it is made of
you and i have the same..!

love makes enough sense to be understood
but never enough to be explained.
it can't be explained, not even to oneself
yet somehow we all exactly know what it is.
& whatever it is
you and i have the same..!

it changes the way you see the world,
the sun is warmer, the moon is brighter.
we imagine how love would be
but it's so different, so much better.
it makes life ecstatic
or maybe it just makes you happier
but whatever it is,
my love, you and i definitely have the same..!!
— % &

-

The world hasn't seen your tears,
You're lost amidst all your fears.
You don't see a ray of hope
'cause there's no way you can elope.
You cannot endure the pain,
You feel all your tussle goes in vain.
You just want someone to say
That everything will be okay.

Hold on, you'll shine bright like a star
Just embrace the beautiful mess you are!
Darling, the sun will shine
No matter what, everything will be fine!

-

He gazed at me,
My mind stopped.
He touched me,
I lost all my senses.
He hugged me,
I melted in his arms.
He pulled me closer,
My innate desires were incited.
He kissed me,
I felt high without drugs.

His presence itself is enough to set my soul on fire.

-

will you just stay for a while? no? okay!
• ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ •

i feel like i'm losing myself everytime i scream into my pillow.
i hold back my tears not because i'm trying to hide them
but because crying is actually exhausting now.

my mind gets overwhelmed with self destructing thoughts
& i can barely remember even one of them.
my heart races as if it's a lion standing in front of me
& catching my breath is the most difficult task at the moment.

i've learnt to blame myself for everything
& unlearning it isn't as easy as i thought it'd be.

how did i even come here? i guess i'll never know!
i was happy, carefree, a lil stupid but i was happy
& now i don't remember those moments as my happy ones
it feels like i was ignorant to anything that hurt me.
do i wanna become like that again? no!
i know if i become like that again i'll lose myself forever
but i'm tired & self love is apparently not at all my cup of tea yet.

so will you just stay for a while?
& it's okay if you don't want to.

-

if love could talk, it'd probably say...
"don't wait for me
don't run away either
& stop trying to define me
you cannot, you don't need to.
stop expecting me
from someone who doesn't value me.
i'm within you
but that doesn't mean you'll keep donating me.
let the other person earn it."

"glorify me? hell yeah.
never stop it please.
increase it if possible."

"you can feel me when you hold their hand
for the first time
i'm right there when you're dancing with them
in the shower, under the moon, in the rain."

"i watch you both laughing and crying together,
teasing each other. you look beautiful in each other's arms!

"i'm glad you have me.
& it makes me happy that you think i'm enough"

Ps: sometimes you'll think i'm not there but i am.
look into their eyes, hold each other's hands you'll find me. i'm right there supporting you both, smiling at you!!!

-

i believed every inch of me craved for you incoherently
only to realise i'm actually in need of my own attention
♡________________________________

my mind kept thinking about you
as if nothing else mattered.
my heart kept seeking you out
as if beating would be worthless if it wasn't for you.
i wanted you to hold my hand and keep me close.
take me in your arms
for i thought that's where i belonged.
the bleeding songs of the sea entwined
with the aggressive rhythm of the wind
pictured my desires just right (or so i thought).

but then i realised i'm searching for the love
i should be getting from myself.

all my insecurities were for you
i was scared you'd love me less if you knew about them
when i should have been scared of hating myself.
while i loved the sunsets with you
i forgot to appreciate the one setting in me.
i kept waiting for your love
only to realise i don't have to.
i never failed to degrade my worth.
while i appreciated your dark parts
i forgot to embrace mine.

i don't have to wait
for i can get whatever i desire..!!

-

How did I get lured..
lured into your cold heart.
& now I'm trapped inside.
My love isn't warm enough to melt you
yet you won't let go of me.

I don't know why do you wanna do this.
Why are you still holding on to me?
You're not only wounded,
but you also don't wanna heal.
You don't let anyone in
so I'm just trapped all alone.

Although my love will keep me warm
but I'm scared I'll be cold soon or I'll die.

You don't come near
yet you keep me.
You keep me inside of you
holding me tight
but not in your arms.

-

Tell me you find me fascinating enough to not give up on this
& that you'll do whatever it takes to keep me.
Tell me you're here to stay, not just for a while
but for an eternity and a day more..!

Tell me you'd rather be nowhere with me
than be somewhere beautiful without me.
Tell me you're here to love me, even when it's difficult
& not just when it feels good..!

Tell me you see me smiling at you
when you look into the future..!!

-