You know what's terrible ?
When you sense the feeling of loneliness
Midst of known crowd
Where you witness your
Efforts and pain
Turning pale and invisible!

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Where the canva is in a state
Doesn't letting any new creations
Rather
Wanting to recreate
The old one which
Gave the artist
Life !

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I appreciate the love you shower
Let me have some break !
Break which will make
Me love myself
Be proud
Be confident - just a day
I know the words which builds
You are from mouths of people
But show me some - Mercy !
Let me smile for a day
Can I ?

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My happiness
Stays until
Waves departures
From the shore !
May be that's
Why
I never let them go
Rather get
Immersed...!

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What you need doesn't need you !
Searching
an invisible shoulder to lie on is
what people do
Than to get hold of
True visible one's!

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Reminds me
Of what we have lost
Together
In this long journey of
Separation!

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Some sweet memories
Many Bitter ones
Heap of Sourness
But still;
We didn't untie

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Quite unknown to many
With humpty words
Enclosing the real
Which can't be read easily !
Better Fathom;
The Unsaid than Said one's !

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And I lost it
Forever, the voice which comforted me
The voice which heard in me all time
I lost it; you killed it
I opened up; i acknowledged
And it finally flew away to the place where I can't
Now no one can replace it, the absence of it slow poisoning me
No ! U can't help,
But, I was happy having the voices in me
I didn't feel lonely, now everything went
The person I had in my utopian world
The person I had in my real world
Both, went off ! Again I am all alone, having no voices heard, killing myself dying inside, faking smile ...
Why did you do this to me? why did you kill the voice I heard? why did you kill him ? It's not kint sugi to repair and look all good .
It's me, a person of soul and blood
Kintsugi doesn't work !
You took all I had, i didn't had many but one only one, you took that, you killed him by knowing him....
I lost Karthick, I lost me and loosing self , confidence everything .
I am inhaling a slow poison, which is killing me ,
Untill I I get my voice back I don't have a recovery ! If it could come !
But you can't help in that .

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Humans are very strange
Piling up a clear
Agonised
Defeating thyself
In rage of showing off
To prove someone
But not
Oneself !

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