Me: Zindagi itni bhi buri bhi nahi hai yaar

Zindagi: Abhi kitna bhi makkhan lagana hai laga le, thode dino mein teri toh main tel laga ke lunga.

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*Having momos with crush*

Crush: Is wale mein toh fillings hi nahi hai
Me: Jisme hai vo toh dikhta hi nhi na tujhe?

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Mother: Aaj kaam mein hath kyu nahi bata raha? Kal toh itni madat kar raha tha.

Son: Mummy kal Mother's day tha na bss isliye.

*Successfully recieved chappal, jutte, belan*

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I'm a verry vella human...
If you dm me now, I'll reply immediately in few days :)

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*Some girl replied to my story*

Brain: Reply her and continue chatting
My hands: Like it and leaves...

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Break-up hurts the most,

Kabhi phone charging pe laga kar, switch on krna bhule ho? 😖🤧

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If famous brands start making condoms with their tagline :-

KFC– “It's finger lickin' good”

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*Texting to crush*
Me: __________
__________
She: ye kya kar rahe ho?
Me: Line mar raha hun 😌💞

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Ok Google, what happened on 31th December, 2019?

Google: Kisi chutiye ne 2020 ko nazar laga di thi.

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*At Barber Shop*

Others: Bhaiya step cutting kardo.

Me: Bhaiya side se pura kaat'do aur upar k baalo ko chuna bhi mat.

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