Beatific Blues.
(Read caption)

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DEATH.
(Poem in caption)

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Vulnerable Verses.
(Read caption)

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And sometimes your own people
whom you consider to be your
closest won't be the best at giving
you help, comfort or information.
They want you to be safe and
are looking for you but remember
your dreams can't be defined
those who never got the chances
upon making theirs come true.
Often you might receive
judgements, demoralization
or get called mean names,
egoistic if you've learned
upon standing up for yourself.
Never let the naysayers make
you feel pessimistic about
your dreams.

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Dear 20 year old self,

I can see you losing anger,
fear and inhibitions. Doubt
has been slowly shedding
itself away from the layers
of your existence. You're
becoming your own favourite.

To people out there,
none of this makes sense
at all but to you it does. That's
what matters. Don't be scared,
sweetheart. You're becoming
a butterfly while blooming
from an old cocoon. — % &As frightening it might
seem right now, don't block
yourself from being the river
who harbours silt of friendship
and love. There's fertility
blossoming at the bosom
of your rockbed. You're
no longer defensive or
throwing wrathful pebbles
at people when things
don't go your way.
You're learning to release
even if that might make
you bleed for a short span
of time. — % &Remember, what you saw
today at the rooftop? Fog
travelled through your
hometown and the trees
were silently bustling during
its presence but they never
made a noise despite the
disturbances. Sweetie, I know
that the last two winters left
you trembling in fear while you
hesitated upon looking yourself
straight in the eyes.

— % &But guess what, it was
neccessary for you to fall,
fail, hurt and wail as you'd
smear yourself in a complete
pool of scarlet dropping layers
which consisted self loathing,
negativeself talk and anxiety
which would usually shake
you up. All this time you've
been a control freak, tryna
control everything but my
love there's one thing you've
learned through this chaotic
mess. That you're love
and awareness.




— % &Those sleepiness nights,
tossing and turning, restlessness
and crying was all worth it.
You've been poked deliberately
where the wounds still winced,
as well as gained new blemishes
but I can see you kissing them
everyday because they became
your doorway towards becoming
more vulnerable with who you're
and who you'd become. Yes, you're
losing people, identities and things
almost every other day yet my love,
that's the way life will be. Let it slip
as sand does, watch it fall like the
water and move faster than the winds.








— % &I'll be there through every
transition and rollercoaster
ride that you're gonna go
throughduring these
upcoming years.

Yes, your mind has
been messed up lately.
Though that's fine, you're
switching from survival mode
to safety. Let them bark. You
got this. Look at you cupcake,
you've never been this open
about your reality. Even if they
call you sentimental after reading
everybit of this emotional piece,
it's my earnest request; don't you
dare stop writing these stuffs.

You need yourself right now.




— % &Maybe in this moment,
you feel helpless,
wounded and pale.
But remember, the
person who has
mustered up courage
upon being emotionally
open and admitting
toxic patterns is braver
than those who consider
emotional intelligence
as stupidity.

Too many voices,
opinions and verdicts
seem to cloud your
personal originality
though don't let
someone else's
limited beliefs
limit your capability.

— % &

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God is the Sun
and she is His
precious
sunflower.

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Never knew she'd be
at a loss of words at 20.

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These days, she is a just a
hot tempered active volcano
who has been blooming
into scarlet looking molten gold,
burning everything it touches
out of sheer pleasantness
and seasonal growth.

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I'm just scared of speaking
because everytime I do so,
they slaughter my tongue or
butcher these lips but they
can't handcuff these fingers
or censor the mind. Thus, I'll
write and bleed on paper
during the absence of tears.

And smile, because I owe my
younger self an apology for
all the self loathing done
in the past.

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I've always been a stubborn river
who could never settle at the
changing banks.

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