I’ll call you
Let’s meet for lunch
One day
It never comes,
And before we know it
People fall out of our lives
Like my roommate this morning
Cancer
She’s had it a few months
And I thought I had years to catch up with her
To pick up right where we left off like we always do
Only I didn’t know cancer had put us on a schedule and
I missed the train
One of those people I’ve known all my life,
Why would she suddenly not be around
People fall out of our lives every day
So make that call, meet for lunch,
walk together while you can

-

I look up and my breath catches
A pale disc among the clouds
in a light blue sky
tells me
beauty, mystery
have always been there
had I eyes to see it.
The tides rise
to its hypnotic pull even at noon
and I feel it, how
Orion’s Belt, Cassiopaia, the North Star
are always there for me too
waiting for dark moments
to show themselves, light the way 
like my parents.

-

Water lapping at the very edges of earth
I feel I can hear it
from here on the space station
floating in the inky ocean that is the sky

The stars surround us in the millions
like bioluminescent fish in the deep
drawn to the light of the anglerfish
towards their own destruction

Water, space, us in-between 
Here I see how,
smaller than a speck of stardust are we
yet we strut 

like we own this blue-black space

-

If I could cut a door into an onion
Would it take me to its white pearl heart
With tiny scent bombs lining the walls?
Would its brown curtains crinkle shut
Would its domed roof keep me dry?
And when I’m ready,
Would its greens shoot me to the sky?

-

She lays out her ware,
purple white gems
on trays of green,
for passing bumble bees.

-

I watch you throw your head back,
eyes closed
to memorise a line and sing it to the wind,
in Tamil. 

To hear the finished piece is one joy,
but to sit in daily practice, sublime.

-

When the worm of worry
starts burrowing in your head
the first to go is sleep
the next the mind
whirring, churning.

The heart beats fast.
It becomes hard to breathe.
Tears roll down cheeks.
You lie rigid staring into space
as your worst fears unfurl
unstoppable.

You make bargains with God,
realise how futile it is all.
You visualise hurling rocks at idols,
but with nowhere else to go
you stop.

You lie face down on the cold hard ground
talking to Him, to yourself.
You remind yourself to breathe
You sit up, hug your knees
then lie down with Attenborough
under torchlight

You lie next to the children,
feel the relief of their arms
heavy around your neck
who think they need you,
not knowing how much you need them,
and wait, for the night to pass.

-

Time is the most elastic of elements.

In india in the village it just sat and stretched into hours of waiting, for it to pass, for heat to subside, for electricity to return. Our heart beats slowed, we too sat like lizards on a rock.

In Singapore it runs breathless into the next hour, day, month, dragging us behind it like children, wailing they need 5 more min. Here we must carve out time for the self, for others, otherwise we'd be swept away. When the set time is over we need to snap back like rubber bands, to hold everything in place. 

Only Friday night feels light. Without the pressure of having to wake up at 5am and run the race again first thing in the morning, the heart beat slows a few seconds. The improbable hope of a tomorrow to take up the slack of today, this week, this month, allows our smiles to linger. We fall asleep, grateful for the respite we imagine awaiting us over the weekend. 

-

There must be a joy in being sad
Why else would we linger in it
when it comes

Matters of the heart
are not easy to talk about
When all is well we don't
When it starts to fall apart we can't.

We fall in love at the speed of light
fall out at the speed of sound
but the memories we form
linger at the speed of scent

so let me revel in the sweet perfume
of the sepia tinged
and just be sad.

-

The kingfisher preens before me:
look at my back, he says,
blazing brilliant blue.
Now look at my white heart
nestled in velvet brown.
Hear me trill to the dawn:

Good morning good morning!

The world rises in greeting:
a squirrel leaps for the tree
a terrapin waves a flipper
the woodpecker drills a trunk
green parrots zip by in formation
a water hen bobs its lean white neck
crickets ring, steady as a heartbeat,
Flowers scent the air
The green leaf holds promise un its vein
New buds wait, ready for their time
The forest erupts in song:

Good morning Good morning!

-