Happiness hasn't been found in any words we've spoken,
This bond we had cracked with every sentence and now it's broken.
I thought I needed you, and you needed me,
But all we've been doing is searching for love in this relationship full of debris.
It may be best if we stopped trying,
4 years of tainted love I've got no tears left to keep crying.

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The same old story again and again,
My heart tugs at my chest until it's torn open.
Why is life so hard,
I'm taken back by just a single word.
I can't decide who to love...
Broken hearts, trust, and everything above.
Love notes from both its tug of war,
I'm split in half but I lost my core.
"Give me a chance to improve I promise I've changed"
All this back and fourth my feelings get rearranged.

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...If i chose to see the light at the end of the road,
If I let go of the pain I grasp and choose happiness to hold.
If I just looked a little closer at the clovers in the field,
Maybe I'd find the lucky ones even in the midst of a battlefield.

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Humanity is slowly failing to succeed,
Everything around me is glowing with greed.
Lowering expectations is what i feel i must do,
People you may encountered will do nothing but defeat you.

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We tried to be there today on the day that dad's are praised.
Your kids miss you the kids you failed to raise.
But you still haven't answered you probably aren't even there.
You said we don't love you but how can we when all you wish to believe is that we don't care.
We want to be there even though it pains us,
To see you smile that so sought out smile.
But what even is a dad when you don't fit the description,
Weve heard so many stories about other fathers but the one we read was fiction.

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I can't explain it..
The feeling if sadness when all I want to be is happy.
The insatiable hunger when all I feel Is full.
The wanting of love but space at the same time.
The knowing I'm not okay but only ever saying I'm fine.
Why do we do this to ourselves.....
I want to scream but then I seem mad,
I want to cry and run away but them I'm told "you shouldnt be sad".
What is it I should do,
To better me and better you....

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Lumps of clay lay in front of me,
Molded figures only my imagination can see.
Two indents create two eyes,
The beholder of those soughtful cries.
A lump in the center creates a nose,
With each lie told the lump grows.
Perked up lips a heart shaped smile,
Luring in, love is vile.
Pointed ears as plain to see,
Whisper softly don't fuss at me.
Raised brows a worried expression,
The pain expressed was of the most intension.
Freckled face sun kissed cheek,
This feeling is all but bleak.
This smile shows happiness,
Sewn into place a permanent bliss.
On my table a face is made,
A impression of my own carved from a blade.
A masterpiece formed starts to fall apart,
Leaving the face as it was to start.
Just a lump of clay upon my table,
Turns out like clay this life is just as unstable.

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Stuck in the essence of a white room.


Poem in caption

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I don't want you, the person you are because of her,
I don't remember how we were.
I can't explain it, its just there,
The feeling inside cluching at air.
It's not up to me to intrude,
I ask and received the news Is crude.
I don't know what I expected it was plain to see,
That the more I ask the more it pains me.
We are close but not a pair,
For me to hold you back wouldn't be fair.
You do as you please,
Soon enough the pain will release.
So from now on platonic it will be,
No matter how hard, no matter the pain no matter the tendency.

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What's this feeling that I'm feeling that's a little to real,
Spinning in my chest sinking in with every reel.
Choking feeling less than Devine.
Slight drops of tears on my waterline,
I can't say it my tounge feels swollen,
These words I try and say have been stollen.
Deeper darker more alone than ever,
The knot we tied I thought we would never sever.
Torn in two with frayed ends,
Now we struggle to be just friends.

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