My writer's pen is drying up
My thoughts are running blank
I need that lust
That blinds you
From the red flags
And from feeling
The deceit
I need a toe curling
Walk disorienting
Voice snatcher
Love
I mean lust
I need a muse

-

Rummaging through the graveyard
Of old hurt
Picking up pieces
I thought I healed from
I need a muse
Tired of speaking on old irrelevant hurt
I need amuse
Let me post my ad
Seeking another love
To waste my time
I need it all

-

So quiet
We can hear each other's heart
Breaking into pieces
All because we're trying to prove
Whose trauma is hurt more by the other
The night never goes right
When the past bleeds into the present
We keep hurting each other
To prove a point
Who’s hurt more
Who needs more care
More love
More support
Too selfish to realize
We both do
We can split the care 50/50

-

Communicating without our words
I am staring at you
As you stare back
As we try to control our breathing
And find our voice
The tears began to release
Like a levy or dam
When it has broken
We run into each other's arms
The tone of our voice has softened
And the only thing we can utter is
I'm sorry

-

But the only thing that remains
True
Constant
Is you
Is me
We both choose us
We both choose we
All the time
At all times
Toxic
As it may seem
When the dust settle
I want it to be you
Standing across from me
Constantly
Trying to figure this love thing out
All I want is you
For you to be there
When the dust settle

-

Things you did in the dark
Slowly creeping into the light
Puzzling moments found clarity
Things broke inside of me
When we parted
Mostly for the better
Maybe a thing or two
That's arguably not
Things happen for a reason
So thank you
Thank you for showing me
Your true colors
Had I not seen this
We would be in the vicious spin cycle
That we have had on repeat for 10 years
Mixing my blacks and whites with your colors
Colorful lies
I always stood clear on who I am
And you were just full of lies

-

Things you did in the dark
Slowly creeping into the light
Puzzling moments found clarity
Things broke inside of me
When we parted
Mostly for the better
Maybe a thing or two
That's arguably not
Things happen for a reason
So thank you
Thank you for showing me
Your true colors
Had I not seen this
We would be in the vicious spin cycle
That we have had on repeat for 10 years
Mixing my blacks and whites with your colors
Colorful lies
I always stood clear on who I am
And you were just full of lies

-

Because of you
I jump head first
Out my comfort zone
In a Land Unknown
But determined to survive
How could I not
I don't have blood in my veins
But strength
My ancestors were built ford tough
I didn't have a choice
It's in me
Not on me
Thank you

-

Most breakups
Are filled with heartache
Sorrow and anger
Someone is devastated
Broken into pieces
The other is numb
Unfazed by the situation
Moved on
Crying
As they lay in bed
Tracing the silhouette of the ex’s ghost
While the other
Is caressing the new person

-

Lord forgive me
For I may sin
Releasing myself from the shackles
Finally getting the stains out my darks
Making them bright again
For my whites
Let me grab the bleach
Want to purify my whites
My soul
Not be tainted by society's standards
AKA BS
My heart is closed off
As it is it's genuine and it feels deeply

-