thinking you had it all figured
only to find yourself in a puzzle
a big mess you created while forcing perfection
only to realize you'd been forcing it all
cause it didn't matter what you felt
it would still turn out as bad as ever
but would you mind?
no you wouldn't.
you wanted it so bad you forgot to check run the consequences.
you wanted him so bad, you neglected yourself in the process.
you forgot to love and value yourself.

but did it change the outcome.
oh no it didn't.
he fucked you,
dumped you
and moved on
leaving you broken
pierced and in pieces.
dust yourself, drunk
love written all over you.
now you got it so bad,
what you wanted

-

I'd love to remember you,
but not with our first kiss
I'd love to remember you,
with the memories we had to share
The quarrels and the fights
the love and the hate
I'd love to remember you,
stroking my hair whilst you thought I was asleep.
watching me sleep,
with you enveloped in thoughts
I'd love to remember you,
drawing the lines of symmetry with your lips
marking my body yours
I'd love to remember you,
not our first meeting
when you expected to see someone else
but found me.
I'd love to remember you,
how you protected me.
just you and I.
But I guess you hate me too much
to actually remember me.
I'd learn to live with it
I'd never forget.
I'd remember, I never forget.

with Love
yours now and forever,
Robinfhart

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in an attempt to prove myself,
I didn't only lose sight of who I was
I lost the purpose of my life.
how did I evolve from a girl with bright dreams
to one who tried to please everyone..?
I had to prove I was worthy in the sight of la familia
I had to prove my worth amongst friends.
I had to prove something.
I had to prove I was an equal to a man
it pained me.
in the process of chasing my imagination,
or was it perfection
I lost sight of what was real.
I lost sight of those who cared.
I was tired of proving things to those who didn't give a fuck.
I'd been given a second chance
but I messed it up.
guess I'd need a third
I was fed up with it all
but alot of people depended on me
this drained me like wildfire.
how had this issue escalated this far?
from proving to be the best child,
the best student, the best daughter... trying always be perfect.
just for whom?
who was this all for anyways?
i sit down to realize,
I'd lost sight of what I wanted
of who I wanted to be
in the process of chasing other people's dreams.
only did I realize too late,
I can't even change it
who would love a broken me?

-

Can I share a tale of love or was it lust?
How I fell in love with a he-devil
Hope you know the poet is a female?
Does it even matter?
That was how I met him.
Ascending from heaven or was it hell?
He stole my attention with his wit.
Not only did he steal that, my heart went with him as well.
My handsome he-devil.

He'd given me the world
And all I could possibly ask of
He'd gone into the flames of hell
To save my very own soul
He'd battled my demons
To save my being
He'd given me more than I asked for
So much that I couldn't settle for less
My very own he-devil

But then my heart began to crave for more
More, more, more.
What could I possibly want?
When I had the prince of hell eating from my hands...
But were women ever satisfied.?

-

Wanted to let my heart love again
I'd been encumbered by memories from the past.
How was I suppose to love you,
When my heart yearned for him?
I gaze at his photo,
His frozen smile.
It reminds me of those moments
I wish not to speak about.

Just one more night
This will be the last, I will be rid of him
His stench on me, his kisses stamped on my skin.
I promise I will be rid of the memories, the cuddle and the laughter.
The heartache and the pains.
I will be rid of each moment I dreaded myself for letting him leave.
I will be rid of each memory filled with slow love making,
as our fingers lock against one another, as he suckles on me, his heat beneath
I will be rid of all the pleasures he gave me
The nights filled with pain and passion.
I will be rid of everything my love
So, I can truly be yours, now and forever.
If I were truly yours...

-

It is a misunderstanding
A conflicting emotion
The past is one place I never ever want to revisit
But how tricky of fate
Cause the winds of time brings us closer
How many years has it been?
With your toxic nature,
Your aura so negative it ruined all it came in touch with
You just couldn't let go of this toxicity
I loved you but love wasn't valid
Love meant nothing it was just a word
A word used wrongly
Then it's you and I again
Destiny in play
The past keeps revisiting
Never wanting me apart from you
Does love justify our actions and inactions?
Does it justify our wrongs?
Hate,
Cheating and
Lies..........Does it?
In the end the past can never be untold or unwritten.

-

How did i get caught up in this web?
It wasn't supposed to be this way.
It was meant to be brief.
Me going in briefly and out briskly.
No one was supposed to know
not even my heart.
But my heart got involved i dunno how.
I'd taught it not to love,
not to hold on for too long,
how to drift and never care.

-

Can you let me lie down in my bed of loneliness?
Alone...
No one to hold me.
No one to comfort me.
As my pillows feed on my tears.
As my bed listens to my sob.
With cold spikes stinging my skin.
Just my duvet to warm me
My pillows to caress me
Can you let me just be alone.?
No one seems to understand
How a thousand words i spoke in silence.
How my eyes held series of wonders
You failed to read.
My heart beat an anagram of feelings.
So let me be.
You forget i was once an angel too.
A man used to call Me that,
Once long ago..
My silence broke just like my heart did.
You took me,
Not once but twice.
Promised me what you couldn't give
And like a fool, i let myself believe you.
Now, I am all alone
With no one to call mine.

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