My therapist once asked "what's your idea on love"
I couldn't provide an answer but if i did it won't be the type my parents both share.
Constant fights and disagreements, that got me sick to my ear
Blood bath, tears, all these are too much to bear.
Its like a never ending cycle,
A ticking bomb waiting to explode.
That's the kind of love i would describe to you.

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SITTING WITH GHOSTS


Every morning the same nightmare
Wake back up to reality
All alone in agony & despair
I am losing my sanity

Chaos clouds my heart and mind
I hear the same voice everyday
"My dear, Leave the past behind"
This path is your only way.

This loneliness can't be compared to the pain
The pain of losing the one you love the most
Maybe i am to blame
If I chose a different path I won't be here sitting with ghosts

Every night i dream the same dream
I hear not their laughter but their screams

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When you left, I learnt to be all by myself, all alone
I learnt to build up walls and keep the good stuff out
I learnt not to give to much of me to someone that doesn't deserve it
I've learnt that I'm happier than ever on my own

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I don't feel alone because of you
You showed me what true love is
Even though i find it hard to believe its true
Your warm embrace and tender kiss.

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So here i am, again.
Writing to fill up the pain.
The poems i write
Are the only things that keep me sane & alright
You brought meaning into the word "friend"
Its pains me that we must come to an end
Slowly, ripping out the letters of what to say
I still wonder why keep them till this day
To you,
The one i hold close to my heart
Slowly realizing that we are falling apart
No matter how many times i try to fix it
Its like if I'm not there to hold us together
We've lost one another
Honestly, I've come to terms with it
I can't be in a space where my feelings are pushed aside.
You only need me at your most vulnerable , Especially when you end up alone.
From now on, i know you'd do better on your own.
"Getting older made me realize that you can't force the people you want in your life no matter how hard you try. No matter how many tears you cry or questions you ask "why?" you'll just have to live with the fact that people are here for a reason.
Compliments of the season.

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