sometimes, what seems like nonsense makes perfect sense,
more sense than what I wrote trying to get something off my chest
that clouded up my mind with all the things I was afraid to say,
but alas the sun shines and I can write again about how i feel differently today.
Id like to thank the stars, and flowers that grow, and I'd like to thank you for all the love you have shown.
Life is a test of every lesson Learned, perfection is in the imagination and some flaws are not flaws at all
when seen from a different direction in admiration with the realization
that on a roller coaster you have absolutely no control
but the choice is yours to choose,
to close your eyes and enjoy the ride
but you can't close my eyes too
And i know it sounds crazy but baby so are you,
And I guess what I'm trying to say is
After everything that has been said and done,
I must be crazy too
i hope you understand.......i love you too.-
My name is Alice or so I thought it to be until I followed a rabbit down a hole in a tree
I didnt trip but I kept falling until the objects in the mirror appeared quite larger than me
A Cheshire cat and a man in a hat speaking only in riddles and tunes invited me to unoccasional tea and a smoking caterpillar asked me "Who are you?"
I am not who I was and not yet who I've become and I looked through a looking glass to find which way to go and the signs read THIS WAY and THAT WAY but none of them ever led me home.
A question for the gentleman in a top hat sipping tea:
Is it possible to believe in seven impossible things?
The answer darling
If you believe
In believing
That little white rabbits
Lead the way
To Wonderland-
Alice
Is that you?-
Feeling you feeling me
When you kiss me so passionately
The look in your eyes when you stare into my soul
When you took my hand
You took my heart too
Its the sweetest of words that hurt the most
I believed you
When you meant nothing.
I loved you and you fucked me.
Your lies became my truth
And even if you had a heart
to break I still would never
do that to you.-
heart of mine why do you insist
to stay, enduring pain and wasting away
what doesn't kill can break you down and not only the strong survive a weak heartbeat
alive but dead inside
deprived of life
drowning by
suicide.
you're not suffocating
if you're holding you're breathe,
it's not love if it
feels like death.-
Love makes you feel whole again and cleanses of loneliness
Until the stain resurfaces and your alone and broken again.
Love is like the bandage that heals the scabs of a jaded past
But there is no remedy for memories of scars left on the heart when the bandage is ripped off.
Love is like dancing in the rain
Until it floods and you can't hold your breathe long enough to dance under water.
Love is like spinning and spinning and spinning
Until I'm so dizzy I can't stand up
Without falling.
Falling.
Down.-
I am lost.
I can't find my way.
I am not okay.
Priorities somehow shifted
Getting high got lifted
Staying there is gifted
Drifting away from everyone I love.
I don't know who I am.
I only care enough to say I care
I only show up to say I was there
If I care enough to show up at all.
My future is stuck in the past and
Everyday I pray for change and everyday is the same.
I am the one to blame but I'm always looking for anywhere else to place it.
I'm stuck, torn and shattered.
Trapped in a viral cycle
A tornado of broken memories
My family, our home, a career, brand new car, love, happiness, stability, the keys to my heart.
Sacrificed my life to the dark and unpromising.
I want to find my way.
I'm afraid I'll never be okay.
I'm afraid I will never be what I was.
I'm afraid I don't know any better.
I'm afraid I'll fail so I'm afraid to try.
I'm afraid to hurt so I'll never cry I have buried myself alive.
And I'm afraid I'll make a wrong choice so I just don't decide
Patiently waiting for the world to pick a miracle for me.
I'm tired of waiting
But I don't know how to change today.-
If you are a rose I am the thorn
I am ocean waves crashing upon your shore
If you are the calm of a starry night
Or the cool of a morning sunrise
I am thunder, lightning, rain
A natural disaster
I am hurricane
If you are a rose I am the thorn
Because you are a master piece
And I am torn.
-
Trapped
Inside
Raging
Inferno
Haunting
Internally
Spiritually
Mentally
Physically
Lifelessly
Spiraling
Screaming
Pleading
Uselessly
And the flames swallowed me whole
Before they spit me back out
And they kept you.-
A pair of nice guys
Shoulda thought twice
About how much it costs
And who pays the price
Nothing in life comes without a fee and
WiFi coverage isn't guaranteed
And if your grass isnt green
Maybe it'd be cheaper just to water it
Then to trade it for green grass imagery
Beauty seen is in the eye
But even the blind can see
The difference between a picture of grass
And the real thing
Question of the day:
Are you lost in paradise
Or is your paradise lost
If you lose yourself on the way?
And the answer is clear
It doesn't matter because
A pair of nice guys are obviously queer
And their paradise is in the others rear.-