"Why, again?", you asked pointing to the cigarette held limply between my chapped lips.
"Habits are easier than reason", I answered, words escaping my mouth with the smoke, both fading into the darkness of the night.
You smirked & flicked the lighter, the blue flame lit up your face. I could clearly see the intricate lines of your forehead, those black eyes which never turned brown in sunlight, that dark humour which played a discordant harmony on your lips, those sunken cheekbones and dark circles under your eyes, reeking of insomia and that one thing which always fascinated me - your birthmark just under your left eye, covering most of your left cheek like an ink blotch.
As if a writer spilled ink on his drafts in utter mindless haste.
This deliberate brushstroke on a masterpiece that was your face was mind blowing to me, horrendous to the world. Maybe that's why they cringed when they saw your face while I fell in love. I have similar scars on my heart, just because people can't see mine and can see yours, you become ugly?
That's why you had thrown away all the mirrors in your house, used those concealers to cover it up, and draped the scarf everytime you went out?
But that night, you stripped off your clothes and sat undressed in front of me yet you weren't naked. But then you removed your make up and the scarf and that's when the stark nakedness hit me. You bared yourself & I fell in love.
I reached out & caressed your left cheek, I would lie if I say they weren't damp, I looked into your eyes and suddenly, a memory stared right into my eyes from the depth of yours.
The first time I saw you.... 19 years ago, in the kindergarten school bus, they made fun of you while you didn't shed a tear, while I couldn't do anything. How could I when I was the one who laughed at you the most? Maybe if you had cried, I would have teased you again but I couldn't. From that day, I couldn't stare you in the eyes and talk. I was ashamed.
Till tonight, here you are, nineteen winters & nineteen summers later, in my room, staring right into my eyes.
Why are you crying now? I don't know.... wish I never did.
5 APR AT 23:57