Dear Ma'am,
Today is yet another 13th. Like every year, it is very hard for me to write this tribute knowing that you will be never be reading them. I know you would have said that instead of writing these letters i should write on my research. But these letters are the only way in which my grief finds expression.
Recently Anagha and Swati gave me the opportunity to read your article on Dalit Studies as Pedagogical Practice. Thoroughly reading the article was enriching to say the least. Engaging with the article was one of the most academicaly learning experience for me. The depth of your scholarship never ceases to amaze me.
As Swati continuously reminds us, only remembering you is not enough. I must continue to follow what you taught us. That is the true tribute to you. I shall continue striving for that. Whenever i start losing confidence, i look at your small handwritten messages and draw inspiration from it.
Love and Regards,
Debo.-
আমার দুই সহচরী ঐশী আর আনন্দীর অবিরাম অনুপ্রেরণা ছাড়া লিখ... read more
মনের অবরুদ্ধ দ্বার বিদীর্ণ করে ঢোকে ভালোবাসার আলো। আমাদের ভাসিয়ে নিয়ে যায় আশার ভেলায়।
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Dear Mukti,
Happy Birthday Sona.
Chachi loves you and wishes you all the happiness in this world. Main kahi pe bhi rahu, humesha tere pass hi raheti hu. Kabhi bhi kuch bhi share karna hai toh apne Chachi ko yaad karna.
You are my naughtiest child. Yet you are my most hard working girl. Bas thoda padai kar leti toh tujhe leke mera sara tension khatam ho jata.
Khudka khayal rakhna. Khana pina time pe karna. Dadi ko please mat satana. Doodh time pe pee lena.
Love you beta.
Yours,
Kaki Maa.
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প্রিয় ভৃঙ্গি,
শুভ জন্মদিন।
জীবনের অনেক ওঠা-পড়ার মাঝে আমি তোকে পেয়েছি। তোর ভালোবাসার আশ্রয় পেয়েছি। শত মান-অভিমান পেরিয়ে তুই আমার একান্ত আপনার জন। তোকে কতটা ভালোবাসি সেটা কোনোদিন বোঝাতে পারিনি। আজ তোর বিশেষ দিনেও পারবোনা। শুধু একটা কথাই বলবো। আমার জীবনে ভাই আর বন্ধু একাধিক। কিন্তু আমার ভৃঙ্গি একটাই। যাকে ছাড়া আমি অসম্পূর্ণ। নীলের প্রতি আমার কৃতজ্ঞতার শেষ নেই কারণ ও আমার জীবনে তোকে এনে দিয়েছে। তুই না এলে জানতামই না নিঃস্বার্থ ভালোবাসা কাকে বলে।
ভালোবাসি তোকে। আর কিছু জানিনা।
ইতি
তোর লেবুদি।
পুনশ্চঃ: আমায় বিয়ে করবি?-
Dear Mahi,
Happy Birthday My Child..
Even before i was married, i remember you used to talk to me over phone. You were hardly a 4 year old kid at that time. I have loved you ever since then.
On my first day in this house, i remember you insisting that you will call me Kakimaa because the word Maa is hidden in it. I loved you more that day. I did not allow you to call Kakima because your mothertongue is Hindi. It does not matter what you call me. What matters is how we feel about each other.
No matter how we are related our bond is unique. Your cards on Mother's Day always make me feel very special. I feel very privileged that you have given me that status. Your Kakima loves you too.
You are a very brave child. I am very proud of you. I hope you grow up to be a sensible and responsible person like your Chachu.
Happy Birthday once again my dear.
Love,
Kaki Maa.
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Dear Ma'am,
Happy Birthday.
All day long, i have been seeing long letters that people have been writing for you. Yet i could not gather enough courage to pen down my thoughts on this day without you.
You will be happy and proud to know that the light you had kindled in my path to research, has been very ably carried forward by your trusted friend and comrade Anagha. She has been a very patient and excellent research guide through all these years. She is the second best mentor i could dream for. You remain my best mentor and guide in every way.
Words are the only gift i can offer you today and that is what i am trying to give. As a tribute to you today i have been reading your most cited book "Writing Caste/ Writing Gender" for the umpteenth time. This is the only way i know to remember you and pay tribute to you. Your book is like my bible for research.
With all the terrible violence going on in the country, my only solace is that you are spared the pain of it. But i miss your voice of resistance which i know would have been the loudest today.
Love and Regards,
Debo.-
Dear Ma'am,
On 15th July 2013, 2 days after you left us, your KSPWSC team had met on our scheduled Study Circle at 8 in the morning. You would have wanted us to do exactly that. That was our way of paying tribute to you. Today in the times of this Covid pandemic, when it is not possible to meet physically, we met for virtual Study Circle to read, discuss and learn from your writings. Your KSPWSC team stands strong under the able leadership of your trusted comrades Anagha and Swati. We remembered and paid tribute to our mentor, friend and above all a scholar of unparallel brilliance. We hope to learn and follow from your life and writings. This was the best way we could have remembered you.
7 years have passed. It is still difficult for me to accept the truth of your absence.
Love and Regards,
Debo.-
স্কুল ছাড়ার পরে প্রায় একযুগ পর সেই একই পুরোনো রাস্তায় অকস্মাৎ দেখা হলো দুজনায়। যে যার সুখী সংসারের অভিনয়ে মত্ত। একসময় যারা একে অন্যকে না দেখে একটা দিনও থাকতে পারতো না, তারা আজ অনায়াসে পাশ কাটিয়ে গেলো একে অন্যকে। বাইরে থেকে যতটা নির্লিপ্ত মনে হলো ততটা নির্লিপ্ত আসলে ওদের মনের ভেতরে ছিল কি? নাহলে সেই রাতে মেয়েটি কেন নিজের diary তে লিখলো, "আসলে কি বলতো, তুই সেদিনও ভীতু ছিলি, আজও তাই আছিস।"
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আমার সেদিনের সেই ছোট্ট মেয়ে আজ গুছিয়ে সুন্দর করে গল্প শোনাচ্ছে। তুই কবে এত বড় হয়ে গেলি সোনা?
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