I'm here again, encircling the emotions
That i couldn't control. That dumb heart
Has grown so wild and stubborn that it
Refuses to listen and understand that we
Can no longer miss them.

It still beats faster at the thought of them
And the brain stupidly do send that annoying
Smiles to accompany it. The happiness it brings
Sends a hot wave of old good memories and the
Pain and feeling of brokenness comes in.

The heart is then reminded once again that
The ache and laboured breathings that kept
Us awake was caused by them. But even though
They have hurt us, we once cherished and loved
Them. It's not easy to let go of what you once
Cherished and loved. We still miss you.

-

I have seen it all or that I have
Felt it all. I once lived a day thinking
It was my happiest because I laughed
And daydreamed all day.

I once lived a day thinking it was my
Saddest because I wept and never
Believed that I will survive the pain
That engulfed me.

I don't want to sound like I survived It all,
I still have fears, sadness and joy that tagged
Along. And i'm not done exploring this
Experiences because the best is yet to come.

-

It means letting it all go or so I thought.
I was still trying to fix what never did had
A beginning. Trying to mend what was
Never broken. Trying to find what was
Never lost or misplaced. Trying to
Repossess what was never possessed.

"Does moving on means forgetting?"
A lie I trapped myself in. I even got so
Clingy to a future that was never mine. I
Dreamt about dreams that excluded me.
I became a shadow and once upon a time
In their stories. The memories I held onto
Were the ones where I made them smile.

As I was moving on, I forgot to forget it all.

-

.....

-

We were in love or so I thought.
I loved too much that I became Juliet.
I cared too much that I became a mother.
I gave too much that I became Santa.

I endured so much that I became Job
I worried so much that I became a worrywart.
I cried too much that I played the broken hearted girl.
In the end, I realized that I was actually the only one in love.

-

The reunion that i engraved
In my mind did not turn out
As I envisioned it.

We were just like two strangers
Exchanging greetings. The whispered
Promises of love was long forgotten.

The heart made for me have been
Given to another. I guess it wasn't
Really mine to keep.

When I saw you again,
May the heart not bleed but
Accept its loss and live to love again.

-

.....

-

.....

-

There was no other words left.
My eyes were too heavy and burly
To see what I was typing.

The story I started with happiness
Have drowned me with sorrows.
The love that sworn forever to me
Have forsaken me forever.

I'm the one who survived this
Incomplete story to make another
Complete story.
Love found me.

-

....

-