Kya Itna Bura Hun Mein !!....

Har roz ki tarah us roz bhi raat hogi,
Aasman mein chaand ki khubsurti bhi saath hogi,
Ummidon se sajayi thi jo duniya maine,
Wo ekdin toot ke bikhar jaroor jayegi,
Naseeb ka haara kismat ka maara hun mein,
Jindagi ke is gehri si samunder mein dooba hua mein,
Mila hai aaj tk jo bhi mughe adhura hi mila hai,
Pura chaha tha jb bhi meine kismat se,
Badkismati ne har baar raasta roka hain,
Kya koi bta sakta hai kyo har baar mere saath hi aisa hota hain,
Kya itna bura hun mein......

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Vanwaas......

Jin haathon ne humein thaam kar chalna sikhaya,
Apne kandhon par baithakar duniya dikhaya.
Har zarurat hamaari bina kahe samjhi,
Mushkilon mein bhi muskurake sabkuch sahee,

Woh maa-baap aaj kyun lagne lage bojh se,
Kyun katraate hai unke aankhon ko katra bhar roshni dene se?
Kyun unka budhapa lagta hai bhaar,
Jinhone humein badaa kiya dekar snehh aur pyaar.

Kutte-billi ko ghar mein rakhte hain shaan se,
Maa-baap ko hataate hain maan ke bogh se.
Waqt ke saath jo cheezein lagti thi nyaari,
Ab wahi maa-baap jab kuch kar nahi paa rahe to unhe kehte hain — "bekaari."

Jinki daant se kabhi sudhre the hum,
Aaj badee hone par wahi daant padne par kehte hai ki - "Paresha ho chuke hai inse ab hum",

Waqt ke saath rishte kyun badal jaate hain?
Buzurg maa-baap phir bogh samghkar ghar se nikale jaate hain.
Chhod aate hain unhe vanvaas ki raahon mein,

Akelepan, dukh aur marne ki haalaton mein,
Daulat ke peeche bhaagti is duniya mein,
Bhool jaate hain bachche unhe jo kabhi mehfoos rehte thee unki parchhaaiyon mein.
Jinhone kabhi bhookh hamaari dur ki,
Aaj wahi maa-baap bhookh se haare apna jee.
Jo thee hamaare jeevan ki pehchaan,
Aaj ban gaye hain "faaltu samaan."

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Umar bhar gaalib ye bhool karta raha,
Kaanton ko phul samghkar dil mein rakhta raha,
Uthta raha baar baar dard ka ye silsila,
Magar ishq tha janaab, sabkuch jaankar bhi wo khushi se bikharta raha.

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Usee dekhte hi chehra yun khil jaata hai, Jaise unke hone se mughe sab kuch mil jaata hai,
Kaise batau ki tu mere liye kya hai,
Tughe bass ek baar dekh lun to pura din ban jaata hai.

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Mehengi hai tu kohinoor se bhi,
Khubsurat hai to hoor se bhi,
Door se dikhta hai chaand pe daag,
Par bedaag hai tu door se bhi.

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Aapke chehre se jhalakti hai masumiyat iski ab mein tareef kya hi tareef karun,
Khuda ki is nayab takhaliq ki tulna mein kisi se kyu karun,
Hass de jo ek baar kisi pari se kamm nahi lagti,
Bas apko dekhte hi mein apki aankho mein khone lagta hun, ab tum hi batao mein abni jazzbaton ka kya karun.

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Teri aankhon ki gehraion mein dubb jana chahta hun,
Hosh mein to hun par madhosh hona chahta hun,
Aur khubsurti bahar se nahi aatma se hoti hai,
Ye tumhe dekhne ke baad jab se ehsaas hua pata nahi mein kyo tumme kahi khone sa laga hun.

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Meine pucha khuda se ki wo kyun chod gayi mughe uski kya majboori thi,
Khuda ne kaha na kasoor tera tha na galti uski thi meine ye kahani hi likhi adhuri thi.

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Ab wo daur na raha ki hm pighal jayenge,
Jo ab hm bann chuke hain ye ummeed mat karna ki hm badal jayenge,
Ek hi gum par bahut ro liya hai ab humne,
Tum fikar na karo waqt ke saath saath hm bhi sambhal jayenge.

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People say that I am very irritating,
Reason is Just because I am overtexting,
They never tried to understand my emotions & feeling,
Its all because of my nature of posessiveness and too much caring,
They distant themselves form me leaving me behind in the state of overthinking,
Sometimes my heart feels heavy but still unable to cry,
Still thinking everything gonna be normal again If I just give it a try,
But at the end I am left behind to repent on my acts and think what wrong I did to make them cry,
Death is the only way to peace and calmness from this shitty life,
Everyone will be happy with the news that one soul is no more alive.

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