कभी कभी हार जाती हूं, खुद की लड़ाई में खुद से;
कभी कभी खुद को हराती हूं जिंदगी की जीत के लिए।— % &

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Unpredictable is the meaning of life. So, hold on to this truth with less expectations and more hope. I agree some days or most of the days will not be in your favour where you might have to deal with dozens of millions of thoughts in your head and might be in sedation of pills of overthinking but hold on, breathe and let the day pass. You cannot control your breathing and therefore you will breathe until there is a hope of survival, you will breathe till the next sunrise and you will breathe till the next moment of happiness to cherish the beauty of life which is again unpredictable. Every minute counts the seconds of your survival that you fought for yourself. Try to balance yourself in the justice scale of life advocated in your own court. Allow yourself to breathe freely and inhale all the moments with courage.

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चाँद यूं फ़रमाया की अब वो हमारे लिए पूरा नहीं होगा कभी,
फ़िर क्या था, तारों के बीच फसां कर हमने भी उससे पूरा इश्क़ कर लिया।

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खुद से बिछड़ना महसूस किया है कभी?
खुद में खुद ही को ढूंढ के देखा है कभी?
रास्ते में कोई पत्ता आ गिरा हो तो उसके पेड़ के खोज में गए हो कभी;
तुम्हारे ऊपर एक छत है फ़िर भी मकान के खोज में गए हो कभी।

भीड़ में अकेलेपन से गुफ्तगू किए हो कभी,
जैसे सुखी पत्तियों को एक हरा पत्ता मिल सा गया हो जैसे,
टूट कर भी अपनी रूह की खोज में हो जैसे,
गिर कर भी ज़मीन से जुड़ने की तड़प में हो जैसे।

दिमाग बड़े ही सवाल करता है मुझसे अक्सर,
जिसके जवाब मुझे सिर्फ़ ख्वाबों में आते हैं,
जो उठते ही टुटके बिखर जाते है अगली सुबह जैसे
दिल ने कभी दिमाग के वो सवाल पढ़े ही नहीं।

अक्सर सोचती हूं लिख ही लू कुछ ताकि,
विचारों के भोज को मैं अक्षरों से निपटा दू,
एक पल भर का फासला होता है अक्षर और मेरे बीच में कि,
फ़िर खुद की ख़ोज पर निकल पड़ती हूं।

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Fantasizing in a real world is difficult because people don't understand the artist inside you. Keep it alive always.

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I'm dreaming to be his own in all imperfect ways. I'm in love with his imperfections in the perfect way. I'm fond of his smile. I have targetted the human he is to acquire his humanity in me. I'm aware of his love. I'm in love with all that can be called on his name. I'm attracted towards the soul he has and the beauty he is. I'm addicted towards the spark that I get everytime I see him. I know it's something unusually weird and captivating but I'm aware of one thing that it will not harm me. It will heal me, nurture me and emblaze me.

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I know that this is not the way you should be treated and considered. I know this is not the promise that they gave to keep you happy. I know this isn't the path you have been choosing to pick yourself up. But trust me, you will get through. You will get through by your own and you will understand that you deserve to be happy and loved. You will ask yourself questions based on why you were desperately dependent on somebody else for your own happiness. You will realise that you're enough for your own existence to suffice yourself. You will allow yourself to feel free because you're a soul made of love.

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Who knows if your healing can become a book of stories for others.

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बाज़ार तो कई खुले हैं समान बिकने के लिए,
बस न जाने क्यों, लोग भी बिकाऊ दिखते है आजकल।

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Life is very demanding. At times, your life is demanding because of others. It's demanding in a way that even if you're not desiring for anything, others will demand it for you. Factors will come into the picture where you will feel like whatever you're doing right now and whatever you've done till now is useless and that you've achieved absolutely nothing. Society will demand things for you or from you which you yourself is not desperate to have. Money, marriage, status, career, financial conditions, day to day changes in your life, all of these comes into picture at once when you understand that may be you're not living a life of yours but for a systematically rotten society who plays a better role of a paprazi. And when we assume that may be these things are there to be sorted, then comes, a bunch of people who is stubborn and egoistic based on their behaviours because they follow that default patriarchal system which symbolises nothing but hatred. Life is demanding and it's norms too. It's just that you're breathing in to live and breathing out for the society.

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