What if there is no way back?
What if there is no solution?
What if there was never any solution,
Or maybe it was never wanted?

What if there is no point?
What if there was no point,
Since day one?
Still it went on,
You kept silence,
Held a false faith!
Hoping for it to improve.
Hoping for 'him' to improve!

And 'it' did improve, indeed,
But for the worse!
And now it's worst!

So, for how long, or how far
Will you still be silent,
And hold on to the false?

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Would it matter
If I had a long tiring day
Or a long tiring past;
And if I'm unable to do
The chores everyone expect-
To keep the house neat,
To pack lunch for you & the kids,
Be present at elders' call,
Or to manage every bit part?
But
What if I messed... messed it all...!?
Would you still come home
And sit beside, hold hands
To let the misery slip by?
Ikyk I'm no perfect from our Day 1
But if it's for anything
Can we be 'Us'?

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WHAT is it that you're fighting for?
WHO is it you wish to please?
WHERE is it that you want to reach?
and HOW is it that you want to live?

I've lost quite &
Blessed as well with many-
Loved ones, Moments, Memories...!
Emotions & poetry remain
Two constants: to hold me,
Help me- feel, to consume
And get consumed.

I too, like you, know not for sure
Answer to these what, who, where or how.
But what I do know for sure is
That your Faith can get you through.
That a slight change in perspective can do wonders.
All you need to know, I think, is to
Breathe, Feel, have Faith & Repeat.

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As much as I'd want to embrace
I do get afraid
Of the new beginnings.
They feel surreal and ecstatic.
And 'You Never Know What Happens Next'
At times, can make you timid.
But:
Breathe It in and breathe It out
Let it be,
There's no doubt
Faith and Fear never co-exist
Choose your path for
It isn't just the destination
But the journey that's in your part.

-

In the quest of finding
My 'happy ever after'
I got deluded
By all the fallacy:
Roses and Vows,
Kids and a House.
I clenched the thought tight,
And it triggered: Fear
Indeed, of the uncertain, Of
All the 'what ifs'.
Then I got reminded, somehow,
That even if it all turns untrue
Choices could still be mine
To Be or Not To Be.
And amidst the chaos
I am to ensure
That I live the life... to it's fullest.

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I'm believing you to the waters:
Regal blue, rivers clue.
I want to clutch tight-
Every word you uttered every night,
And though I know it's deep & dark
And all I could gather is faith to abide-
For you are everywhere and your words alive-
I persist, in every sigh.

-

You could never guess
What a person is, or become
Within the four walls.
What all & what not can
One be from within
Deceiving everyone from without.

And you'll never know
What a life you could've lived
Unless you truly try to
With all your might & love

And I'll never ever, my dear,
Tell you to settle
For anything less.

-

I've been awake in every state line
Dying to make it last us a lifetime
Trying to shake that is all on an incline
Find me a way, I'll be yours in a landslide

-

Dear
Love Yourself First
Love Yourself
Before you surrender to those pretty eyes
Or little silly lies
Love Yourself
Before you give up all, that
You think is yours
Love Yourself
Even before the 'ideals' for
They too are but a man's design-
Invented; fanciful!
Love Yourself First
Accept & Embrace
It isn't selfish;
It is self-less
For You are the miniature
Of the very existence-
The Life

-

Here it goes again,
Every single moment repeating itself
Yet again, I feel this urgent need
To talk to,
Be heard & understood.
And I wish, someday,
A day soon, I'll meet 'the one'
And be at ease for
I'd talk, be really-
Heard and understood.
But then again what if do not!
What if I could not!
What if there's none!
It's all just a play of 'wishes' after all!

Then I'd take refuge in writing.
Yes! Again!
For it's true & very much tangible.
Blank & white sheets to
Let it all out:
Fleeting doubts & lasting desires
Fear of uncertain
Yet faith in the fate.

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