Maybe I wasn't writing poetry,
Just stitching wounds with words.
Not for applause, not for art,
But to keep my heart from falling apart.

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मोहब्बत की थी बड़े शौख से जिससे हमने
उस एक शक्श को भूलने में
मैने अपनी पूरी उम्र गवा दिया।

-

If I Can Love The Person That Much
Who Don't Love Me Back,
Imagine How Much I Can Love The
Person Who Also Love Me.

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और भीड़ में चलते चलते मै ये सोचता रहता हूं,
तुम जब खाली रहती होगी तो क्या सोचती होगी।

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तुम्हारे जुल्फों को तुम्हारे चेहरे से हटाऊं तो कैसा लगेगा
जब जब तुम मुझसे रूठों तुम्हे मनाऊं तो कैसा लगेगा
कैसा लगेगा अगर मै मिलो चलूं तुम्हारा हाथ थामकर
उदास होने पर बिना पूछे गले लगाऊं तो कैसा लगेगा ?

तुम्हारा गुस्सा चुप चाप सुन लूं तो तुम्हे कैसा लगेगा
फिर तुम्हारे बालों को सहलाऊ तो तुम्हे कैसा लगेगा
कैसा लगेगा अगर तुम्हे कहूं कि तुम मेरी हो जाओ
फिर तुम्हे मै अपनी गोद में सुलाऊं तो कैसा लगेगा ?

अगर तेरे बिना सब कुछ अधूरा सा लगे तो कैसा लगेगा
तेरी ख़ामोशी को भी इश्क़ समझ लू तो कैसा लगेगा
कैसा लगेगा अगर मैं तुझे देखूं और दुनिया भूल जाऊं
अपने हर साँस में सिर्फ़ तेरा नाम लूं तो कैसा लगेगा ?

थक जाओ तुम्हारे लिए चाय बनाऊं तो कैसा लगेगा
अगर बारिश में तेरे साथ भीगूं तो तुम्हे कैसा लगेगा
कैसा लगेगा तेरी खुशी के लिए खुद को कुर्बान करूं
तेरे साथ अपनी पूरी उम्र गुजारूं तो कैसा लगेगा ?

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Maybe love is a gift meant for people who are whole, and I am nothing but a patchwork of mistakes and regrets. Maybe love is a light meant to guide the worthy home, and I am standing in the dark, hands outstretched, but never quite touching it. Maybe love is a song, but my voice cracks when I try to sing along, and so I fall silent, convincing myself that silence is safer than being heard.

Maybe love was never meant for someone like me not because I don’t want it, but because I wouldn’t know what to do with it if I had it. Because I would drop it, break it, ruin it. And it would hurt more to watch it slip away than to never hold it at all.

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I shouldn’t have called her. Maybe deep down, I already knew the answer, but my heart refused to accept it.
"Why did you leave me?" My voice was barely a whisper. "Did I do something wrong? Was it me?"
For a moment, there was silence. I held my breath, hoping praying that she would say something, anything, that didn’t hurt. But then she spoke, and her words shattered me into pieces I could never put back together.

"The biggest mistake of my life was that I talked to you."

It wasn’t just the words. It was the way she said them like I was nothing. Like I never mattered.
I wanted to ask if she remembered the nights we spent talking about forever, the way she once held my hand like she was afraid to lose me. But none of that mattered anymore. Not to her.
And in that moment, I realized she hadn’t just left me. She had erased me.

-

I stopped wondering
if I was enough for other people.
Instead, I started asking
if they were enough for me.
Did they treat me with kindness?
Did they see my value?
Did they give as much as they took?
That mindset shift changed everything.
No more begging for attention,
no more shrinking to fit.
Just embracing my worth and knowing
I deserve the same love and effort I give.

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I naturally pull away from people
I don’t vibe with not out of hate,
but out of honesty.
I don’t like pretending to be okay around people
who make me uncomfortable.
If I sense someone doesn’t like me,
I won’t push myself into their life.
I’d rather step back and let things be.
I respect boundaries both theirs and mine.
At the end of the day,
I choose peace over pretense.
I’d rather be genuine than fake a connection
that doesn’t feel right.

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There are moments when I feel pulled in two directions, caught between the need for stillness and the craving for immersion.
The world is overwhelming,
yet there's something magnetic about the chaos, something that calls me to experience
every sensation, every fragment of emotion.
But then, there's the quiet whisper of solitude,
a retreat where the noise fades, and I can simply breathe.
It's a dance, this tug-of-war between wanting to disappear and yearning to be all in, to feel the pulse of life in its most raw and unfiltered form.

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