Cover up

Mouth sewn shut

Nothing is what you think

Quicker to sink

Your problem to deal

Crying out to feel

Leave a message politely

But make sure you die quietly

-

All he wants
is to be nothing at all
So he breaks his head
against a brick wall

-

I fear no matter what I do
No change in shape or form
Will ever truly satisfy the internal void
Residing within
A scared and wounded soul
Desperate to outrun
His inevitable fate

-

All he wants
Is to be nothing at all
Every day he sits and watches others play
Unable to brave the world
He hits his head against the wall
Stuck inside his little room
Lowered down his standards
To hang around with his best friends
Called doom and gloom
Deflated man of many talents
The habits of the depressed
All fuelled up with rage
A peculiar shape of medically induced hopelessness

-

I feed splinters of myself
To the emptiness inside
Ever hungry
A growing black hole
Void of any comfort
I see nothing
Wandering through a fog
A deluded traveller
Stumbling on bloody wounds
Falling over and over
Picking myself up
Only to fall
Refusing to stay grounded
Whispering sweet lies
For every agonising step

-

HELLOOOOOOOO

-

I am caught between nightmares
night after night
and walking through a waking world
rarely making sense
alone with my thoughts
too much time to think
dangerous combinations
I cannot accept I am not in control
even though
every day I am proved wrong
I try to listen to what you say
day in and day out
distorted noises to a simple calm
my inner turmoil and rust
lost in a crowd with a target nailed to my back
increasing compulsions
to tell me I am not in control
Is to tell me
I might as well retreat inside

-

I am caught between wandering through nightmares night after night and navigating through a waking world that rarely makes sense

-

Alone with my thoughts
And too much time to think
Is a dangerous combination

-

I cannot accept I am not in control
Even though
Every day I am proved wrong

-