A Reflection On Loss
April 08, 2024







Rest In Caption

-

We talked a lot.
We laughed a lot.
That feeling of something
heavy on my chest,
That feeling of suffocation
slowly faded away as
they all started to leave one by one,
and the funny thing is,
I didn't even notice.
I guess that's what happens
when you're having a good
time with your close friends.
You lose track of time.
Well, that's the reason we're friends.
Oh, and the last one to leave
was Melancholy.
Always the first one to arrive
And sneaks away without a goodbye.
Never said goodbye to me.
I don't know what to say...
I mean, it's hard to understand
Melancholy
(I'll say Melancholy's pretty
grumpy and cranky).
Well, they're all gone now.
I feel good and at peace ,
thanks to them.
I'm feeling sleepy finally.

Oh, shoot! It's 6 AM already?
That's not what I meant and
That's not how
I wanted to lose the track of time.
Well, another sleepless night for me.
I'll feel sleepy and irritated
the whole day again and
won't be able to enjoy it at all.
That's exhausting.
Anyways, I can't sleep now
even though I really want to ,
So yeah ......another
SLEEPLESS NIGHT
for me.

-

Present is my only liberator.
It helps me to break free
from the chains that bind me
to yesterday's voices inside my head
and tomorrow's unpredictable
outcomes full of uncertainties .

Past is haunting and
future is full of speculations.
Living in Present is not an escape ,
it's a choice that requires a lot of strength.
Dwelling on the past or
worrying about the future
often prevents us humans
from fully experiencing
the beauty of the present moment.

By untangling ourselves from the chains ......
These chains of -
"what was and what might be" ,
we mortals can find the
joy of living fully in the - "now" .

This world is full of individuals .
In this world,
some are trapped
in the chains of the past,
some in those of the future,
and only a few are truly living in the present.
Only a rare few embrace the present.
Is it ironic? I think not.
Rather, it is a
pitiful fact of our human condition.

-

I determine its taste.
It's all up to me, what taste I am craving.
It can be sweet, bitter, or foul—
full of misery and sadness, or
it can simply taste like corrosion and death.
It can smell acrid, like something's decaying,
or at the same time,
as hope—something ripe and full of fragrance.

There's no need for
me to look for a way out.
This is my very home.
I live, I breathe here.
I feed on this negativity, misery, and sadness.
It has no hubbub or commotion.
The only place where I truly feel alive.


I can say the void is a
synonym for peace.
The peace that is achievable
by me in my mortal form
just by sacrificing the
very things that make me human.

The peace I achieved
by sacrificing the elements ,
the pieces that define my humanity.


Finally,
I'm at peace.
Finally, I'm home.

-

Humans have something known as faith and hope.
Even When everything's gone and gets taken away from them ,
still they're left with that.

I wonder how to kill them off .....
Oh wait , killing takes away all the fun .

I need to see their miserable faces,
Want to hear them screaming in agony and pain ,
Want to see them crying their eyes out till their eyeballs pop out ,
Want to see them rubbing their eyes till their skin starts coming off and it's gets bloody ,
Beating themselves to death, but still can't die.

How can i do that?
I need to do something so that
I can feel good , I can feel alive .

Oh yes ,
I've Just found a perfect way to do that .
The best way is killing the very last thing they're left with.


All I've to do is murder their faith and hope .

I mean Just imagine ,
They are hoping to die, but all of a sudden there's no hope anymore.

So yeah,
All I've to do is
murder their

FAITH and HOPE

-

How can I be grateful to others
If I don't even know them ?
And
How can I be grateful to others
When I already know what kind of person they are ?

-

Sitting in an empty room
Staring at the wall
Breathing in the air
Thinking how did I fall?


I know that this
Isn't the end
I just need to say FUCK IT and
Stand up once again.

-

I am what I am

In
The
End

I'm Just a


Flawed Human .

-

Ah there he is .

He's looking at me ,
like he wants to tear me apart...
To sink his teeth in my flesh ,
mince my meat and chew it loudly in front of me as I die ,
He just want to mock me.

Look at him
Like a shadow All black , tall and empty like a void.
Master of darkness , misery and negativity that can devour the whole world.
Smells like corrosion and death .
He tells me a lot of things.
Truth , lies , temptation
Sadness, killings , blood.
Wants to be one with me .
He's pissed .
Waiting to unleash his rage on me and others .
He's a monster in black .

But that will never happen because
I keep him in check .
His thoughts can't devour me because even though I'm a human , my thoughts are far more evil than his .
If I'm the one who keeps him in check and don't set him free ..... doesn't that mean ....
I'm a Monster myself ?


That's scary !!

-

She's as pure as a dove and as calm as a sea
Looks Fragile as a flower but she's not weak ;
She holds all the power in the world ,
More than you can imagine
Walks with a crown on her head , she's a queen .

-