When its 12am , the rush of all the mistakes, the helplessness of keeping expectations from whom you started to consider to be the right people.
The cycle of betrayals, things spiraling out of control , the constant fear of not being able to handle what life throws at you.
An echo of silence when you keep your head low , call your lord , close your eyes, the next morning you feel the dread of life as you wake up , smile to your family , forgive those who hurt you , feel the need to move on because responsibilities dont ever leave your hands , to protect , to feed , you close your eyes to the world praying again this is all for the sake of an foretold afterlife after this constant trials of downfalls with some lucky enough events that make you hold on to your sanity just enough.
What a cycle of deciet , lies , greed you endure
©actively_lazy-
I was fine knowing you were going to a stable family and your parents were happier than ever for you.
They say if you love someone it's their happiness which should be yours.
I'm not doubting us or what we have. But I don't want you to go through what will come if we take the next step. It won't be flowers and facy living. It won't happy relations and bright future.
We accepted that its for the best...
It's a year now and I'm greeting you both together,' such a perfect couple' and 'made to be together' are the only words I keep hearing.
I apologize for not staying long and leaving early, I'm sorry I can't say the goodbye you wished for. I can't stand there with everyone adoring you , my legs tremble and my heart is about to burst. We made a choice a year back so don't cry now, I don't think I'll be the shoulder you need anymore.
I'm happy for you, Its just silly love after all.
-
With the smoke decaying my lungs I could finally let myself be the culprit of hurting myself.
This feeling of going numb and dizzy is all I could ask for when cries didn't help at night, the suns heat felt cold and alienated in the day.
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With days leaving me behind, the nights are the only one embracing me anymore.
-
I kept following you and it got darker and narrower, to someplace I couldn't escape.
In my narrow vision, all I believed was how bright you were getting while everything kept faring away.-
You try to survive as a rose by getting thorns all around you ,
Else you'll get plucked and left to wither.-
Do you wish to be a coward and choose not to care anymore so you don't get hurt?
Do you wish to be selfish and choose not to care because it meant nothing when you used to?
Or
Are you still naive and hopeful?-
The more effort I'll spend on people to get to know them,
The more easy it'll become to regret ever knowing them.-