To my pawfect doggo,

When I was depressed
And everyone left me
I found you
sitting right beside me .

When this world taught me that being kind
is the biggest mistake I have ever made.
You told me that my kindness
don't let your smile fade.

When I felt that
my existence is worthless
You made me feel that
for you my presence is priceless

Everytime I see your face
I find a purpose to live.
You give me happiness
that noone else can ever give.

(Your impawfect hooman)

-

Today I set myself free ,
Free from the chaos that binded me.

I'm letting go of the demotivation they gave ,
And the depression I suffered.

I am forgiving myself,
And forgetting the regrets I have .

I'm not meant to drown forever
Just because I ran after 'forever'.

Though my guilt will never go away.
And this suffocation too will last.

But I've punished myself enough now,
And from now on I choose to live.

Because I'm more than 'my worst mistake',
better than what others see me as !

-

I'm a poetry awaiting to be read,
a piece of emotion awaiting to be felt.
You can find me in words,
in rhymes and in metaphors.
I live in memory and memories are penned as me.
I just carve for someone who really understands me.

-

Thank you my love for teaching me
to love myself more than I do to you.
You told me to value myself
and my worth which I never knew.
I blamed you for giving me the pain,
But it was a mistake that I made.
I took wrong decisions
and let myself fade.
But you became my strength
And made me self aware.
You holded me and saved me
when I was drowning in despair.

-

I trusted you more than anyone.
And gave you my heart.
Now it feels like I made a mistake.
And it hurts me like a dart.
For you made me feel
like I'm not worthy of being loved !
You made me suffer to an extent
which I didn't even deserved .
Actually the mistake was mine,
I believed you more than I believed myself.
Despite of what you did to me ,
I still can't love anyone else !

-

On some days we talk a lot,
While on others I just write to you.
Sometimes we are miles apart from each other,
While at others you can find me right beside you.

On some days we spend moments together,
While on others we'll remember those as memories.
Sometimes we'll tell each other our dreams,
While at others we'll be lost in our own reveries.

But When you'll go through ups and downs,
I will care for you.
Whenever you will look for me,
I'll be there for you

-

Is it pain
that hurts us ?
Or is it
just it's memory ?

Is it a person
who falls in love ?
Or is it
Just his heart?

Can something be
really wrong ?
Or that's just a
matter of perspective ?

I ask you n myself too
these endless questions
And to the possibilities
they lead.

Find answer
And live if you can.
Don't let urself just
drown in greed

-

I remember those days
When you became my friend.
I made a shell around me
to hide the sorrow I was sinking in.
But you saw beyond that shell ,
Heard all my tales
Made me believe in forever
And you became my safe space.
You were like a lightning to me,
struck me suddenly,
came with rain of relief
but left me in fire of love.
A love which I can't even accept,
A love which I can't even supress.
I guess I found my forever,
Forever which you made me believe in.
Forever which will only remain
in our memories and our hearts

-

Sometimes what we need is,
not to feel anything.
Sometimes numbing a pain
helps more than healing a wound.
You see, healing is a long process.
We don't even always know that
a wound can be healed or not !
What's broken can be fixed or not !
What's scattered can be gathered or not !
But there's one thing we always know,
that if at that moment we stop feeling that emotion,
things will be easier.

Living will seem more possible !

-

It's been 8 months,
Since I broke down.
I tried to heal.
But The more I tried ,
The more I got shattered.
I thought it's just a matter of time
I trusted me to be fine soon !
I waited and waited for months.
And then I decided to gather
the shattered pieces of my soul !
And I did it !
I was ok ! I'm ok !
But I'm not ME anymore.
I search ' the me ' in myself !
People keep changing ,
And I too. I knew this.
But this time
I cannot withstand
this change .
This change which I thought
to be temporary !
This change which is
not changing.
I confronted my emotions
And tried to cope with it.
But I lost !
And again I lost myself !
I locked up my feelings .
And they are still under the mat.
And it's not helping
I am empty.
The poem I used to bleed,
seems to be coagulated
by my emotional baggage ;
And I'm not trying anymore ;
I'm not me anymore ;
I'm just a void now ;
Or maybe just a mess

-