You were lying on my lap
Looking at her

Smoking all her worries away
She was with her man, oblivious of your gaze
And you needed me still
To keep you company
To make your bed when they retired to sleep

I felt weak not strong being able to sense this
I felt betrayed not welcomed in this house of happiness

I never saw you act like this before
She wasn't even your acquaintance
Just the girlfriend of the guy you adored
And I'm hurt cause I know you love me more
But your affection for her I can't ignore

When you remembered everything she wanted to explore
When you felt like leaving when she wasn't around for score
When you failed to see what I wished in that group of four
I felt betrayed cause I thought you were there to make my wishes soar

-

You were lying on my lap
But looking at her

-

You said it is fine cause you never knew
How scared she was setting herself infront of you
All the indecisions when started breathing
All the demons when started floating
The best became the bad
And the good never felt the right again


She deceived happiness for an insecurity
Jumped off a cliff, leaving her tribe hanging
You said it is okay cause you never knew
What she did to stop herself from wanting you


After the smiles and the curiosities
The picking up and the dropping spree
The rainy night leading to a feverish week
She used to have better immunity
After you asked her to stay back
Doing nothing but whispering this and that
She still wishes she didn't text you that night
when you were leaving
Wishes you didn't show her
You wanted her beside
Only to draw more lines
And all along she knew, it will not end how it began
A dream she should've stopped dreaming
the day she left teenage

-

I'm a low key intuitive person
struggling with varied emotions
out in the world without motivation
and it's a long way till I reach my destination

But I'm stuck here in between stations
wondering what I'm really doing
if this is the right way
or just a temporary turn in this situation

Staying low key is the only way towards salvation
But all these thoughts are messing up my probation
Maybe I am doing something wrong
or stuck somewhere indefinite
But everything is drifting and there is a haze
covering my destination
But I still wanna conquer it
and defeat all my inhibitions
Even if it means losing myself
in this commotion

-

Where do you go at 2 at night
In solitude when you're feeling a fright
Who do you talk to when you have doors to knock
but none to truly go inside
Who do you love when you loved those who forgot
to check if you're doing alright
Who do you call when you've killed the innocence
of every bond good and right

Where do you go at 2 at night
When sleep is still far from sight
When it's only pain which seems alright
When the walls of shame start claiming your might
When your past eats up your present's bite

Where do you go at 2 at night

-

say goodbye.

-

Cause I kept on taking
each decision absent mindedly.
Indifferent of the consequence,
I was happy in the free fall.
Like the divers of the sky living the thrill of it all.
And when I turned on the safety valve,
nothing popped up to save my soul.
No one standing to help me crawl.
I didn't even know what I was doing till before.
It's like I lost the main colors from my wardrobe.
Only blues and greys covered my bedroom floor.
But I did make them pay for stealing my clothes.
And my conscience died
of the drugs which kept me high.
It's like everything ended
for me that night.

-

Every f*cking day is a tough day
Every freaking way is a tough way
Life backstabbed me with an innocent face
Even this betrayal seems like my mistake

For choosing good over bad
Yes over no
These tests and trials
Never seem to go

-

We didn't click any pictures
but created some precious moments.

And every time I'll think about them,
I'll wish we had some captures done.

But then again I don't want to be content
looking at our portraits when in distance.

I would rather yearn for us to collide
and create some more pitiful times.

-

Golden




Love


Together they become
Golden Love

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