Gagan Chaudhary  
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Joined 5 November 2017


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Joined 5 November 2017
25 DEC 2021 AT 2:54

Painfully beautiful are the shatterings that did not make a sound...

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28 OCT 2021 AT 11:09

I am claustrophobic
But how can I escape
This prison inside me
Which is me itself.
Can I be more than what I am?
Not something positive
Nor something negative
But someone that is not what I am
Or is it
As old men before me professed
That, world is all but a bigger prison
We, it's inmate
And jailers of our hearts.

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5 SEP 2021 AT 14:54

Mentors

It does startles at times
To take 'first name' upright
Transitioning from college to corporate
Not teachers but mentors, the shining armours and our knights.
Be it basics of mailing
Or conversations in meeting
Those tiny details of massive importance
Ignorance and infallibility keeps fleeting.
True that, we cause
Blunders - some big, some sharp
Still, helping us get over with
A lesson - to learn and someday impart.
Just not professionalism,
Ways of being with, are taught
Years of experience in what they think
We, new souls to be wrought.
Sincere thanks for the care
And catering our varying doubts
With achievements and consistency
Will do our best to have EF stand out.

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18 AUG 2021 AT 10:57

Never gift a song

If someone asks you for a car
You gift them a Ferrari smart
If they say 'your heart'
Pack it as 'fragile item' and be apart.
But in no circumstance
Say - here's a song for you
My friend, my lover, my part-time someone.
You loose that song, forever.
For each instance becomes a bitter remembrance with sweeter remarks
Each rhythm, each syllable
Feeling forced and rushed, to reach end
But whose? But whose?
With the end, there is an impossible start
Ending in only a limbo.
So why not think a little more
Next time, before we slip in love?
How much it is, in us, to be damned?

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28 JUL 2021 AT 13:48

Self-of-anything

My dear shrewds, with selfish motives
Grinning flamboyantly, behind curtains
Self-love, self-care, and self-respect
Are but your new-age moral contraceptives.
Because of that thousandth Instagram post of 'leave it all'
And your distant friend's pet cat advising you, to 'be the boss'
That reel telling you what's toxic, and what not
Human ingenuity is at point-blank, shot.
To care, is not forbidden
To choose better, is a birdsong
No need of telling how, why and when
But being firm - since when it became wrong?
Why statement of facts - is called unwanted justification
Why desertion is seen as the right move
Why the decisions take place almost instantly they cross the head, overnight and one-sided
All in name of the self, but whose?
Since when we took opinions as truth
Since when being worse is not shitty, because a lot exists like us
Maybe the day when standing brave, for unadulterated words and choices were frowned
Self-hypocrisy, was the moral truss crowned.

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23 JUN 2021 AT 12:07

Phasing Out

In my prison cell, I sleep and wake
Daily, to loose slowly
The perception of reality and dreams.
Neither seems false, nor comforting
My eyes getting lost, in dried drains
Where tears used to flow by.
Sleep, a luxury, for the calm
I steal from my future share
To lay awake, only to arise questioning.
Thoughts that dwindle with the mist
I fret to catch some, only to loose others
But what do I remember?
But what do I remember?
I seem to have forgotten now.
So I talk to dear visitors, other inmates
Some cheer me, some feel sorry
And I - just see them. Just see them.
Sometimes feeling sorry, sometimes nothing.

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26 MAY 2021 AT 8:30

My sick dog Ratchet

I bought him home, when four
From a place of abuse,
Which neighbors thought was
His good behaviour's cause. (They say it's not good to talk about it - let's down family's respect.)
He has his own quirks and ambition
Scared and happy, of his own apparitions.
Happy after long, he got his favourite ball
Which one day bounced off, for eternal awol.
He misses supper now, unknowingly
And those absent minded intermittent fasts
Doesn't anymore drinks my whisky
Lost taste of cigarettes, that he thought would last.
Still, he bestows at me, a sober smile.
Because he knows, I know
So we bark, on each other's behalf
Turning happily sad, apart.
I pat his head, an empty condolence
"Wait boy, who knows?"
So we both somewhere believe lies
It's fine, because we both are broken
Truth is truth alone,
Some illusions allow, bitter transcendence unspoken.

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21 MAY 2021 AT 23:12

Miseries and Marmalade

Precisely, at 12:15 - I pick
The disconnected receiver of my phone
Pressing the buttons, to
An old number, notes from an old trombone.
Even after, hearing the same
Unwanted, repeating and stale dialogue
Of phases, the okays and 'move on'
This hour can be, my happy monologue.
The whole day, of things
Grateful I am, to their kind words
But still, cannot tell
That I was happy with you, with us - between all the thirds.
I oscillate between, just spaces
Both empty, as you smashed cupboards
Of the apartment, we had
There seem no difference, to those bluebirds and signs of biohazard.
I wish that could I have
Lived this misery, certainly better
Than but this unjust desire
And wait for illegitimate newsletters.
The best and worst part
It doesn't matters, to you
You're right on your end
For me, now your answer - Who?

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12 MAY 2021 AT 18:35

It's still day
For a weird reason
There is still light.
And the clock says - it's six
The minute hand going forward
Seconds hand still pacing.
It seems, but lie to me
Against standard definitions saying
Not a lie, if it's visible clearly.
What does that exactly mean?
Even thunder at night includes a day
But does it eliminates darkness?
I cannot make sense
Everything seems to be rushing
Yet staring back, dumb and still.

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12 MAY 2021 AT 17:07

Downhill on a plain road

I believed for initial three minutes
That I am not going mad
A plain road, till eye can see
Is it Wednesday or luck bad?
Nevertheless, days are perennial
And so are potholes and scaffolds near
But why for the stillness I pedal
Another second, irreparable tear.
Understandable, better now
What Alice felt down the rabbit hole
Not the fall, not the "what"
But infiniteness served in china bowl.
O' Mad hill, who loves to eat visitors
I know, your stomach will fill
But afterwards, when munching will stop
I don't want to pedal again, for the chills, in still.

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